Disney Social Media Moms Celebration Recap Part II

On Day One of the Disney Social Media Moms Celebration, we got into the meat of the conference with speakers ranging from Meg Crofton who is president of Walt Disney World Resorts to Matt Jacobson, Head of Market Development for Facebook, to Rene Syler to Fran Capo to to conference favorite from last year Chris Brogan to a performance by Susan Egan and Georgia Stitt. Whew!

I loved the setting of the stage, and the white baby grand piano was ... a real mystery. Fortunately, that was cleared up by the end of the afternoon. Based on the above list, can you guess how?

And of course the centerpieces at each table were pure Disney. It looks ready for a wedding, no?

Meg Crofton shared a ton of detail with us about Disney, much of which really made me think. It is amazing to contemplate how big Disney really is. They are the largest single site employer in US. Their laundry washes more than 300,000 pounds of linens and towels each day. Washing two loads a day in a home would take 27 years. I don't want to even think about that. Disney buses log more than 20 million miles per year. In an entire year, I drive less than half what their buses drive in a single day.

I was most impressed by Matt Jacobson, the eighth employee of Facebook, who is now the Head of Market Development. While he shared lots of facts and figures about Facebook, some of the questions he answered were by far the most enlightening of the day.

Ninety-two percent of moms are using Facebook to check on what friends and family are using Facebook. About eighty-two percent of people are using it to keep in touch with family and friends - meaning ten percent are just stalking their friends and family? Interestingly, fifty percent are finding about brands and companies on Facebook through their friends - and I know I'm amongst their number.

A lot of his discussion was about building a social media presence using Facebook. He discussed a few items I wasn't familiar with - since I only just put up a Facebook page for my blog, after all - from using a notes feature to import your blog directly into Facebook instead of using Networked Blogs to integrating social plug ins into your blog (which I know I need to do, once I figure out how!).

He was also very adamant about keeping your personal and professional identities separate. Your friends should be your "real" friends. If necessary, go through and put them into buckets and lists with different privacy standards (blog, surfing buddies, PTO moms, etc). It sounds like what I ended up doing with my in-laws (shhhh!), but it makes me extra grateful that my blog email isn't the one I used for my personal Facebook account so that I can keep myself separate.

My favorite moment of the day, though, came from one of my pet peeve about Facebook questions. Molly from My Go Mom asked about ensuring that people on Facebook truly are over age 13 as the restriction states. Considering that my nine year old (at the time) niece friended me - I declined immediately - I can see where this is an issue. I don't want or need a nine year old knowing what I'm doing all the time, nor potentially exposed to anything inappropriate, which thankfully my friends tend to be more conservative on that level.

Matt admitted that there is little Facebook can do to guarantee ages, which was a disappointing answer - but also probably realistic. Instead, he used the example of his own daughters. When they turned thirteen, they didn't just get a Facebook account. And he's there; he practically is Facebook.

In fact, he didn’t give his 15 year old daughters Facebook accounts until they could give him a case for why they needed one. And it took awhile. Once he agreed, he didn't just let them set up an account and go. The email account on their Facebook page is an email he has access to. While he doesn't stalk their page or read every email, he sees who they get friend requests from and volume they get versus those they accept – which is a HUGE delta for them.

He set them up so that they are invisible and so have to find friends. It was a pain for them, because they have to work through their friends to find people. This was hard, but the privacy is critical. The good news is that they understand it and are very careful of their privacy and settings. And really, figuring out responsibility and restraint on the Internet is something not enough people figure out. I really like this solution and suggestion.

Our next guest was Rene Syler who was such a hoot but so full of wisdom. She was a news anchor who ... no longer is. She should be back on tv, and I'll leave it at that. She reinvented herself after her firing and eight weeks later her radical mastectomy. Eventually, and finally, she became The Good Enough Mother. And she absolutely is.

As she puts it, "Washed up is just another word for reinvention." After her firing and mastectomy, she still held hope for resurrecting her career, but her agent for 15 years didn’t have the same vision anymore. She had shot a couple pilots, and when she got word that they weren’t going, she fell into a deep depression. She wasn’t the same person anymore – "scuffed up, tattered and torn" is her description.

On a daily basis, she got up, took her kids to school - still in her nightgown with ski jacket - then would stay in bed for seven hours, waiting for the phone to ring (it never did) before going to get her kids again. It was really hard to see the things that were good in her life. Needless to say, she left that agency and was represented by another agency who knew very little about her and instead tried to get her to do something that wasn’t a good fit at all.

And now? She's Good Enough. Two quotes that really spoke to me about her rediscovery: “You may not know what you want to do, but you do know what you don’t want to do. And that’s just as important” and “Every day, I am happy. Every day.” The first speaks to me because I spent so much of my life in that place, fretting and dithering because I knew what I didn't want but couldn't quite put my finger on what I did want - and that wasn't good enough. And being happy every day? That is where I want to be. I know I'm not there yet, but I'm on my way, and I strive to get all the way there.

Real Growth hurts. I have learned more in the last four years than I have in the past 44 years of my life, but that kind of growth, that kind of character building, that soul stretching HURTS. It just doesn’t work if you don’t move and hurt and cry. Look at it in different ways. Listen to things that perhaps when you were up here you wouldn’t have listened to before. Follow your passion because you’ll never go wrong.

It is ok to take yourself off the bottom of the to do list. It’s ok to say to your kids “Mommy needs a break from you” and not feel guilty about it.

The thing I learned that’s most important is that I’m loved. I’m loved by my family, my friends. I have my family who loves me for me, not the image of Rene that the world sees with ever hair in place (sort of). The mercurial mom that they’re treated to, and they love me nonetheless. I have friends who are not of the fair weather variety. I was once the field trip mommy, and I went to watch wheat being threshed. It’s horrifyingly violent, but what’s left is only the good part of the plant. That’s what happened to me. It’s all the stuff that got stripped away, and it left only the good part. The part that’s the nutritional part. The healthiest part.

The fair weather friends are gone because they weren’t there through the nights when I cried myself to sleep every night. I have a core group of friends who were with me through it all, and they love me. Keep hold to your friends and family because they’re the ones who are going to be your lifeline when things are really bad.

I can't say it better than that. I simply can't. Rene is an amazingly powerful speaker, and I am inspired. Absolutely inspired by her.

After a bit of a break, Minnie came out to "talk" to us. She was dressed as Princess Leia, something I still can't tell Mister Man as he'll be too jealous - my little Star Wars lover! Disney officially announced the opening of the Star Tours II ride at Hollywood Studios, a ride that was closed when we visited over Christmas that Mister Man was still hoping to ride this trip. We were on the edge of our seats, hoping against hope that we'd be in the first wave to ride the new incarnation which was why Minnie was there. Sadly, not so much. The ride will open on May 20, and it still has a ways to go, but the next time we come, Mister Man will ride it. I promise.

The next speaker was Fran Capo, who has written fifteen books and is a standup comic. Not knowing this, when she appeared onstage in character mode, I wasn't quite sure what to make of her. She holds the world record for fastest female talker, and I understand how that's possible. Wow can she talk, and it's amazing what she's done in her life but being open to possibility and figuring out how she's going to do something she's finagled after she's finagled it - from speaking gigs to writing books. As she put it, “Just say yes, and figure it out later. When a door opens, just step through it." That may take more courage than I have, but wow is it working for her.

Chris Brogan was up next - and yes, he was again tweeting before he spoke, requesting topics. He was a conference favorite from last year, and he was just as entertaining this year, while still imparting wisdom.

Trying to find your space in the online world can be a challenge, but he has plenty of advice. One of the ones that resonated most was "Don't ask how, ask why all the time." His point throughout was that we are all in the customer service business - and sales and marketing - and we need to think and act like it. As he put it, "There is no magic in the old silk hat. It's putting the work into it and making it happen. Ask 'then what' always."

As the world and our connections to it are changing, there is a lot of fear, but there is also opportunity. He advises that we "create the new dial tone. Now we can connect with people where they are and tap into it in their language. That is so vitally important. You can track them down now! You get information, and then you can do something with it. And you can listen, too – that’s important, as well." And really, isn't that what we're trying to do now?

He gave a few bits of great advice that are definitely not always followed online. First: If you want attention, give attention. Retweet what they're saying. Give them linky love. Respond to what they're doing, and create that connection. It will be noticed. Second: Another secret? Raise other people up. This is something that he finds tends to be uniquely lacking in the mommy blogging sphere. His comparison is that of crabs in a bucket – you shouldn’t get out of the bucket because I’m in this bucket. Really, we're better than crabs, right? Find people who are doing something interesting and lift them up. I love it.

When people ask how to become valuable and sought after in a particular area, he knows what to do. Always be the go to person, the connector. If you’re always putting people together, you’re the one at the elbow and you’re the trust agent that people turn to. It’s less yucky than you just selling your stuff all the time. I don't think I need to expound on that, do I?

He suggests that we look at our websites as our home base. Engage people and make them interested on Facebook and Twitter so that they want to click over to your blog. The other places are outposts. Your job is to use the outposts to get people to the home. Per Chris, Use the Facebook Like Button to share your content but bring them to your home base (blog).
And remember, comments aren't currency. Comments are proof that you hit a note somewhere.

Chris also gave us some really great acronyms to live by. And yes, we all giggled at them - serious though they are in the end.

Always be connecting (ABC). Feed your network every day.
C = Connections everything I do lives and dies by my network
R = Referrals You need them so you can sell to the next person
A = Attention and/or awareness You have to be everywhere, doing great things and sharing it on your blog. Better to write it on the blog than to write it via email
P = Presence You want to be places. You want to be ready & available to be consumed. It's how people get noticed. Post more often, and you get more notice. Get your pics up fast. Post frequently. Be active.

I really loved his recommendations for productivity. Look for pockets of time. Write notes to yourself of things to do and then do them when you find those scraps of time. Stop saying "yes" to things. Stop keeping all your extra tabs open on your browser. It doesn’t work as well as you think it does. Uhhhh, guilty guilty and guilty? And yes, I write this with Twitter open, another four browser windows, and the Food Network on in the background. Ahem.

Did you know he writes his blog posts in 20-40 minute apiece? It makes me feel a whole lot better about the rapidity with which I write and post sometimes. That said, there are some posts - this one especially - that take far more time and effort, and it's important to put that into it when required. He isn't fast for fast's sake.

Chris also spoke last year about not liking when people put their RSS feed directly into Twitter. He expanded on that a bit this year. Don’t put your RSS feed automatically into Twitter. Ask an interesting question or make a point with the answer to go to your blog. Don’t (HootSuite) post the same thing on all social media, as they’re frequently the same audience. What will they do? They will unsubscribe in one or more channels. Likes are more powerful than retweets. Give people a maximum of 2 social media options on your site. Why? Because too many choices leads to inaction – the user pushes nothing. And how many people do you know who do this?

He also chatted briefly (ha! - the joke is coming, sorry) about vlogging. While I don't vlog often, I do put video on my site. Video is the next thing (as he’s said since 2007). Be brief. I’m constantly amazed by people who think I have 11 minutes to watch their video. Talk clearly. Speaking with umms and uhhhs doesn’t help. And edit. Editing is good manners. Brevity brevity brevity – it makes all of those much easier. I'll keep to my three minute maximum. Phew.

Last up for the day were Georgia Stitt and Susan Egan. I'll have to admit that I'd never heard of either before that performance. I know them now. Georgia is a lyricist and composer who plays a mean piano - and sings! Susan was the original Belle in Beauty and the Best on Broadway and was also the voice of Meg in Hercules. They sang, and they chatted. And they were wonderful.

I loved the lyrics of so many of the songs by Georgia Stitt from "The Me of the Moment" to "Nina Doesn't Care" (which almost brought me to tears) to "My Lifelong Love." There was even a song about social media that had us all giggling and nodding our heads sagely. Susan's voice is incredible, and we were treated to her singing "I Won't Say I'm in Love" from Hercules - with the screen showing the scene from the movie in sync with her singing. So cool!

They were a hoot, and I would have loved to have sat and had coffee with them - or better yet - dinner and drinks. I'm so glad they were invited to share an hour with us, especially since they ended with "The Mom Song" - one that the wee ones insist sounds just like me. They tell me it's because I sing. I hope that's the only reason why!

After our day at the conference ended, we headed with our families to Hollywood Studios for a Disney Junior party on the set of "Lights, Motors, Action" - complete with band and dance floor for the kids. There was a fantastic buffet where Mister Man learned he loves prime rib (whoo?) and Little Miss got a whole plate of desserts just for her - dairy free cookies and tons of great fruit. Everyone was in heaven as we heard about the rebranding success of Playhouse Junior to Disney Junior.

Then the band appeared - from Jake and the Neverland Pirates. The music was so fun, and from the show, I believe (shhhh, we don't really watch tv in our house, so we've yet to see this show), as most people seemed to recognize each song. Regardless, they were absolutely age appropriate, something sorely lacking in many family events I attend.

As we continue through the evening, various Disney characters come out to dance with us. It started out with Captain Hook and Mr. Smee - with really only the kids on the dance floor.

The parents quickly jumped in, and more and more characters kept joining us from Daisey to Donald to Handy Manny to Agent Oso and more.

The wee ones were in heaven, and Little Miss continually threw herself at one character after another for a hug. And then she danced. A lot. And didn't want to leave when it was time to go - not that I could blame her!

Mister Man was not a fan of the "bad buys" at the event, but he had a blast nonetheless. He enjoyed dancing, but he was absolutely entranced by the giant television screen overhead. He had a hard time looking away from it to follow along with everyone else. That said, he did his best to dance along with the leaders and following the song's commands. So so cute - I love watching him dance!

By the end of the day, my brain was tired. Really tired. Thank goodness for fast typing at the conference events, or I wouldn't have had anything to write about at all, as my brain got overfull! The next day of the conference was less intense, though we had some great opportunities to interview some chefs and some who are focused on health and nutrition. More on that tomorrow!

First "recap" post on my family's take of the conference here
Day One recap here.

In the interest of full disclosure, I attended the Disney Social Media Moms Celebration. The conference ticket also included discounted hotel stay, park tickets, and some gifts for myself and my family. I was not compensated in any way, nor was I asked to write about the conference. All opinions expressed are my own.

How To Host A Party

I have a new giveaway up for a Monopoly board game here.

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I've been seeing a ton of BlogHer recap posts, and I know I've got one or two in me to write. Before I get to that, I have another topic to address. One of the big areas of focus this year has been the parties - both private and not - that happen outside the conference themselves. Were they all successful? Ummm no. Are there things that organizers and brands can do to improve them? Absolutely.

An Open Letter To Brands Hosting Parties At BlogHer

Dear All,

Thank you so much for hosting the parties you put on at BlogHer (and elsewhere). It's a great idea and an excellent opportunity to showcase yourselves and your brands. Trust me, most bloggers love the opportunity to have some fun while being out and about somewhere they otherwise wouldn't (especially the mommies among us who may not have as much adult interaction as we'd like).

When you host a party, however, it's important to make sure that you're doing everything you can to make sure it's successful and that people there walk out of it talking about it - in a postive manner. And unfortunately, at BlogHer, that didn't always happen.

There were some absolutely great parties - and different things about different parties made them stand out. But there were some parties I heard about that I was glad I wasn't invited to. And some that I attended that I left early.

One important factor is to make sure that you have the right number of people there. While you don't want to have six attendees for a large space, you also don't want to be in a situation where people feel claustrophobic trying to maneuver in the party. I know people are always angling for invites, but you're better off keeping the guest list manageable and having a great party for those who can and do attend. While people might be disappointed that they weren't invited, it's better than being miserable at a party. Invite a more intimate group (and that can be 50-80 people easily) but make it a great experience for them. The 200 or 300 people parties become more about the venue and too generic.

And once people are at your party? Make sure there's something for them to do. I attended more than one party where we were completely left to our own devices - we got a drink and had some passed appetizers and chatted amongst ourselves. That isn't a great representation of a brand, especially if the attendees don't know each other at all. I had the most fun at parties where there was a diversion - be it someone cooking, some sort of a project to make, an interactive presentation by the brand, games to play, etc.

And since we're typically women attending the parties, we dress up. That involves wearing heels that aren't always the most comfortable shoes. And it's possible that we didn't wear the smartest shoes earlier in the day, either. Please please please offer us a way to sit down. I can't tell you how many parties I attended without a single chair. On the other hand, some parties had great groupings of seating that made it fun and easy to sit and chat with friends.

Working in the business world, I've heard and lived "underpromise and overdeliver" time and time again. I attended more than one party where something was touted as being at the party - from makeovers to chatting with a celebrity to br@ fittings and more - that simply didn't materialize. Either there weren't enough makeup artists to get through the attendees or the "fitting" was a chart that a rep walked you through. I would have been happy without those things if I weren't expecting them. I'd rather be happily surprised by massage chairs for five minute wakeup massages than anticipate something fun and see that it won't happen.

With BlogHer requiring all on-site parties to be by sponsors of BlogHer, that meant that many parties were held far from the hotel. I was so impressed by some of the brands that proactively communicated with attendees letting us know how to get to the location - with walking, cab and subway directions. That was a huge help and such a pleasant surprise. And the brands that set up shuttles to get attendees to and from the parties? That took so much stress away and was a really unexpected plus.

Several parties got knocked for making changes once invitations had been sent out. I know that things change, and that's how the world works. However, there were a few parties that changed venues, that mismanaged their invitee list and would only be able to get guests in first come, first served. Let's just say that's going to backfire via word of mouth. Hugely. Delay sending out your invites for a couple days if you need to, but get as much solidified as possible before you start inviting people. Perception is, after all, reality.

At the same time, give invitees enough time to respond. I was amazed hearing from friends that people were still receiving invites in the days before BlogHer started. While some invites and save the dates went out in June, others were far too late. I know I was traveling starting Wednesday morning and had gotten my schedule set a week earlier. I received a couple invites for parties I would have loved to attend, but I had already made other commitments. And once I say I'm going to do something, I won't back out.

With how BlogHer has been evolving, I think more and more people are arriving early and staying late for conferences now. I heard a lot of people say this year that they are planning to arrive in San Diego on Tuesday next year and stay until later on Sunday. Use that extra time to your advantage. Not everyone will be able to come, but it's a great way to separate yourself from the pack. And if you send out your invites early enough, people will be able to plan their travel around your event.

I also went to some events where swag was given only to those invited and their guests were given nothing. Some people weren't sure who was a guest and who was invited, but ... how does that make the guest feel? We don't need swag at every party. Sure, it's fun to get and some of it is really neat, but I'd rather have a great time at a great party and go home with nothing (as I did at a few parties) than have half the attendees feel marginalized as they're walking out - their last impression of the party.

Another issue for some parties was getting people into them. If you've invited a large number of people to that party, make sure that there is more than a single elevator that takes ten people at a time to the point that it takes over forty-five minutes to get in. If the party says it is starting on the hour, don't make people wait outside telling them you'll open the doors "in two minutes" until twenty-five minutes past the hour. If you're crossing names off a guest list, do it efficiently. Have more than one person doing it, and make sure you're going quickly. Nothing kills the vibe or buzz about a party more than having to sit around and wait for something you're anticipating. You don't just want to end on a positive note, you want to begin on one, too.

No one hosts a party not wanting it to go well. And I can only imagine the nightmares that the organizers go through trying to pull everything together - and dealing with some of the more pushy people out there - but there are simple things that can easily be done in some cases to make it a more positive experience. We all want to have fun, and hopefully some of this will help make more parties more fun next year.

And if you want some help planning those parties? Well, let's just say that I put spreadsheets together for fun. I'm a planning junkie.

Hugs and kisses,



PS For attendees, what other things did I miss that work really well and that don't work?

Pre-BlogHer Recap

Holy cow! Have you ever felt so overwhelmed that you don't know where to start? That's me thinking about my BlogHer experience. I had so much fun and packed so much into five days that I've just been sitting here looking at a blank screen trying not to hyperventilate.

I have a plan now though... today we discuss all the fun that we had in New York prior to the start of the actual conference. Then we'll delve into the conference itself - specifically my recommendations for brands who are looking to connect with bloggers while at BlogHer or any other conference. I have lots of opinions about that - and if you do, too, share them! It can only make things more productive for everyone.

But let's start with before the conference starts, shall we? Please excuse the lack of pictures. Since I don't have a fancy camera (yet), I felt rather inadequate taking out my little point and shoot around everyone else who was taking fantastic pictures, so I didn't take nearly so many as I'd once hoped I would.

Melisa and I flew out to New York together. She booked the 6am flight on Wednesday and talked me into joining her. While that meant getting up way earlier than any human should have to (at O'Hare only one security line was open, if that tells you anything), it was worth it to have the whole day in front of us.

Miraculously, our flight arrived early in New York, and we quickly gathered our luggage and got into the near-vacant cab line. Remembering the advice Patty had given, I asked our cabbie to take us to 6th Avenue, between 53rd and 54th. It's possible I had minor panic walking up to the line trying to remember where our hotel was, but my brain somehow woke up enough to pass along that tidbit before going back to sleep. I think I sounded like someone who knew what she was doing.

Once we arrived, Melisa and I headed up to Central Park to do some reconnoisance for our 5K on Friday. Ok, so really we were walking to check out the Shake Shack's location for lunch later that day. Much like those plans, we never made it to check it out before our roommate Sue called to say that she was on her way from Penn Station to the hotel.

Once we picked up Sue, we were off on our "sugar day," as I called it. We started out in Soho at Dean & DeLuca's original store, which was really foodie heaven. I could have stayed there for hours, but other places beckoned.

For example, we had to get lemonade at Balthazaar - where Melisa did not trip in the intersection and meet Brad Pitt, much to her sister's disappointment. And yum, was that good lemonade!

Our next stop was Magnolia Bakery for cupcakes - and yes, again we were headed to the original. As we began our walk, Melisa and I noticed the same cute little shop. And when I say little, I mean l.i.t.t.l.e. It was literally one of those New York places that is a hole in the wall with shutters they open to the street. And they sold mini filled cupcakes with flavors like cookie dough and mint chocolate chip and PB&J.

Just because we were on our way to get cupcakes doesn't mean that we couldn't have mini cupcakes first. They were truly tiny. Amongst ourselves, we came up with three different flavors to try, and they came in a little paper tray - so adorable.

I looked at my friends and asked who wanted to try first. Sue picked up the mint chocolate chip cupcake and popped it in her mouth. Melisa and I looked at each other in shocked silence for a moment before both bursting into uncontrollable laughter. Poor Sue. Apparently she hadn't quite understood our intention of each taking a bit of the three cupcakes to try them all. Melisa and I shared the remaining two cupcakes, however, and then we were off to our original destination.

As we were walking, we happened upon a photo shoot. There was a pretty fashionably dressed woman doing interseting poses on a street corner with men holding up and then putting down sun filters as the clouds came and went. Up the street, we could see a "Got Milk" truck, but when we asked the photographer on our way back what the shoot was for (they were on a break then and no one was around but him), he insisted it was for birth control. We don't believe him. None of us recognized the model though.

We finally got to Magnolia and chose our cupcakes. It's a tiny little store, and the cupcake selection wasn't quite what I was expecting. You choose a box (or a plate) and pick up your own cupcake - essentially chocolate or vanilla - with either chocolate frosting or a pastel colored frosting. Somehow, I was expecting... more. More unique flavors or decorations or something. The rest of the bakery had all sorts of neat stuff that I was drooling over, but we came for cupcakes and I got my cupcake. Yes, the purple one.

From there, we hoofed it back to the hotel to meet our other roommate Momo. Melisa and I changed for tea at the Plaza (yep, more sugar and more on this event later). After tea? I met up with our group at Serendipity where there were people waiting outside with their luggage. It's was a great people watching opportunity.

Serendipity though? I would be find never heading back there again. The food was completely mediocre - and the waiter messed up two people's orders. The famous frozen hot chocolate we went there for (I know, I know... more sugar!) were beautiful, but they were really hard to drink. The chocolate chunks kept getting caught on the bottom of my straw, as did the chunks of not blended enough ice. The frozen chocolate itself tasted pretty good, but it wasn't easy to drink. And the whipped cream on top? Ick. I like whipped cream, but this one had no flavor whatsoever. And of course friends of mine who live in New York heard I went there and immediately had other recommendations of better places to get the frozen hot chocolate. Oh well!

After stuffing ourselves with yet more sugar (I was smart enough to share mine at least), we walked over to Dylan's Candy Bar. Wow is that place huge. It's of course way different from the quaint, old fashioned, super long dark wood bar I'd pictured in my head. It was bright and loud and smelled like all sorts of candy (best time for me to go, as I had zero interest in even touching any of the candy there at that point). The two floors were very fun to explore, and they had just about anything and everything you could imagine. I did find it interesting that the international candy section contained only Japanese candies, but that's just me.

You'd think we'd be done at that point, but somehow we weren't. We hung out in the lobby bar for a bit, chatting. And somehow we learned that the waffle truck was parked outside for the bloggers available and was giving out their special waffles.

We decided to investigate. We weren't really going to eat any. After all, we'd eaten so much already. But no one else was ordering anything, and the guys (Paul and ... ummm his partner) were really nice and funny. So the three of us decided to split a single waffle. We ordered it with a special Nutella like spread that has a graham cracker like taste. And Nutella. And strawberries. It was heaven. It really was too bad that we could only eat a little of it.

From there? It's possible that we just collapsed into bed, knowing what was coming the next day.

On Thursday morning, we woke up early (again) so we could take the subway down to Brooklyn and then walk back across the Brooklyn Bridge. At 7am, this was gorgeous. There were a few runners and bikers, but the bridge was quiet and peaceful - with mostly us oblivious girls wandering across it and taking a zillion pictures.

I loved how there were the points of interest along the bridge where you could stop to read about the history of the bridge and what New York looked like at various points in history. Curious me loved reading all that. My favorite part though? Ohhhh the beautiful breeze that buffetted us as we walked.

I found it really impressive that there were serious joggers going across the bridge. There was a man who was obviously in much better shape than his partner, but you could see him cheering her on and her continuing because of that. There were the commuters biking across to get to work. And there was the sweat soaked woman with a small bag over one shoulder. We saw her later at one of the open areas of the bridge. She was leading a fitness class with another six or so people right on the bridge. It was so inspiring to see her doing that - knowing she was following a passion and had found a way to make a living at it and also realizing that her workout when we saw her had only just begun.

Once across the bridge, we walked over to Ground Zero. On our way, we saw a great founding in City Hall Park, so we decided to stop to take a picture of it (ok, the camera experts did - I was along for the ride though). As we got closer, we realized that it wasn't just the fountain we'd be taking a picture of. Inside the fountain was a man. He appeared to be bathing. We didn't get close enough to confirm whether he did or did not retain his clothing.

Once at Ground Zero, we wandered a bit. It was surprisingly crowded there, and the signage wasn't all we'd hoped. While there was a ton of information on the fences surrounding the construction site, the observation deck has been removed (or at least it doesn't exist where my Droid's GPS took us - and on a side note, BOO to Google Maps for taking away the walking and public transportation navigation with the most recent upgrade; this was not cool). We did visit Engine Company Number 10, which was the fire station located nearest the fallen towers and were the first responders. The memorials there were so moving, and I'm grateful that it's still an operational firehouse. We thought about visiting the Ground Zero Museum, but it wasn't open yet since we had been up and out so early that morning!

Instead, we walked over to Chinatown where we saw all sorts of neat little shops, although we didn't have a ton of time to browse them. We were accosted by the "Gucci, Coach, Prada, Luis Vuitton" criers who were eager to show us their wares in back rooms. We didn't go. I wish we had more time to explore Chinatown - and have some dim sum - but it wasn't to be.

As the noon our approached, our group sans me headed back to the hotel for various tours they were starting. I walked up past NYU to Bar Six where I met two high school friends for lunch. I had some extra time, so I did some wandering of the streets in the general area which was fun. This also provided my most entertaining experience of the weekend. As I was walking, a woman stopped me to ask me for directions. And the best part? I knew how to get to the street she was looking for. I am a rock star.

Lunch with my friends was great. Bar Six has awesome and unique food and is a really neat and quiet atmosphere, perfect for catching up with friends I hadn't seen in two years. Time with them always flies too fast, but hearing what they're up to and sharing some fun stories made it a great hour plus. And it reminds me that I need to spend more time with my friends just relaxing and catching up.

Once my lunch was over, it was time for me to start my conference activities. But in the twenty-six hours before that, I think we did a pretty good job exploring New York! And I wonder why I'm tired now!

BlogHer Day 2 Recap: Photos

Ohhhh my. I'm tired. I'm really tired. I'm apparenly far older than I thought I was. It's a good thing this is only a two day (sorta) conference! But I'm so going to BlogHer10. THANK you to all the sponsors for all the fun they allowed from the various parties to the sessions and facilities -- and of course the way cool swag.

While I have no picures of my swag -- and it's all put away already, it was a really neat way to see and learn about all sorts of products that I might not otherwise use or come across. I'm STILL so bummed I was late to the SocialLuxe Lounge and just missed getting what was probably the most awesome swag, including a Kodak video camera that I would have really loved. I have no "real" video camera and haven't yet justified buying one. *le sigh*

Anyway, I do have a ton of other photos -- so enjoy the show, with commentary wherever I can. And where my sleep derived brain fails me, help me out with some identifications please!



Commentary on each picture is in Flickr but not showing up in the slide show. Grrr. Help?

I didn't make it to as many sessions on Day 2 of BlogHer as I did on Day 1, but there were some great ones. Unfortunately, there were also some really small rooms for some very popular sessions and large one for others. Lots of fun and socializing though, regardless.

And thanks to Weaselmomma -- I got a rather unique and fun experience and photo with Paula Deen. Yep, sweetest woman ever, even rolling down her window to my shock as the limo was driving away to wave at us. I wasn't expecting that at all (really, who would?) so the picture misses most of it since I had already turned it off and put it away.

Lots of way fun parties that night starting with the BlogHer cocktail party on the promenade where we had fun chilling out and enjoying the weather. We moved over to BowlHer after that which was hilarious. I managed to break my thumbnail on the first ball, as usual. They had some surprisingly good food though, and a great atmosphere. Finally, time for the famed Cheezeburgher party in the Presidential Suite that was crowded as all get out. I'd never seen cheeseburgers in a silver buffet warmer before, but it worked! Finally, we had an impromptu SeaMan party in the lobby until we finally gave up and went to bed.

This morning packing things up was a challenge, but I did it. Tomorrow you'll hear about my fun of getting home! But for now, I'm off to bed. I can't believe I really have to work tomorrow, but somehow I'll do it. Here's to more than four hours of sleep in a night!

And to think, BlogHer 2010 is still over a year away. Is it too early to start planning?

Birthday Recap

So yay today is my birthday. I had to work and go into the office, so it was an extra early day. Hmm, maybe that just means I get to enjoy more hours in my birthday?

When I go into the office, I get there by 7, usually work through lunch and leave by 3:30 or 4. Usually. When you work in a job like I do, you don't go by the clock but by how much needs to get done before you leave.

I had a few things that were burning that absolutely had to get out today before Thanksgiving, especially since I won't be reachable at all for work for most of tomorrow (more on that in tomorrow's post). It was almost five before I sent out the last of the emails that I needed to. Right before I hit send, my cell rang.

I missed the call but could see it was my husband. I tried him back but got his voicemail. Then I tried my mom, but it went straight to her voicemail (she was watching the wee ones after picking them up from daycare and preschool). I tried my dad. After five rings, he picked up. Phew! They aren't all avoiding me.

I reassure my dad that it's been a long day but that I'm finally on my way home when my husband beeps back in. I grab that call and find out that he's almost home (yay!) with pizza (what!?). He'd decided that we would get Chicago-style pizza tonight and picked it up without checking to see whether I'd left for home yet. You know, because he always gets home around five on Mondays. I know, that didn't make sense to me either, but whatever. Whoo, my birthday dinner is cold pizza! Gotta love that hour plus commute in rush hour.

And my presents? My husband gave me one last night. It's a new heart rate monitor. I'm really curious about how hard I'm actually working, and I know the ones at the gym are notoriously off on the treadmills. Plus, I want to see how hard my yoga and belly dancing (shut up, don't laugh) classes really are. And tonight I got my second present. It's a new lid to the Cuisinart. The old one cracked right through from grating too much good, hard cheese.

Yep. I got two presents. Both are items I mentioned last week when my husband finally started thinking about my birthday. His excuse? I don't want to go overseas because of the dollar right now, so he didn't want to plan a trip somewhere. Oh, and he didn't have a chance to go to the new pilates studio yet to get me a few passes to use the new Cadillac machines (or whatever they're called). Oh, and I only gave him like five things off the top of my head last week, and he needs to save some for Christmas. OH! And he doesn't know what a BPA-free bottle means, so he can't find one.

Next time? I'm telling my husband I want these for my birthday. Go check 'em out -- Mama Kat's giving them away even! The blogger who makes these has some real talent in her jewelry making!

So let's sum up the yuck to get it out of my system: really early morning, 10 hours of work, 2 nonpersonal presents, and cold pizza for dinner. Wheee!

Now for the cool things:

When I got home, there was something wedged between the screen door and the main door. It was a package of chocolates with a handmade card from a friend of mine who lives FORTY-FIVE minutes away and her daughter. I almost cried. How sweet was that?

My dad made his very first cake EVER today. For me. Apparently no one else could find the time to do anything about a cake, so he sucked it up. Granted, it was a white cake from a box, but he made homemade frosting. And he wrote "Happy Birthday Mom" (as in from the wee ones) on the cake in chocolate chips. And he filled it with raspberry jelly. How sweet was that?

Ok ok ok, so I have to share his frosting making story:

He tried to mix the butter and milk, but they wouldn't mix together no matter how hard he tried. My mom was at bridge, so when he called, no one was answering the phone. He was on his own. He finally figured out that you had to mix in the rest of the ingredients.

Whoops, he didn't have enough powdered sugar (which he called confectioner's sugar because that's what the recipe called it, and he got all confused when I said something about powdered sugar). He made a trip to the store and finally found the powdered sugar. He also made a discovery. Did you know they sell premade frosting in little cans? What a concept. He was tempted to scrap the whole idea and just buy some frosting, but then he remembered that he had ingredients sitting in a bowl and manned up.

Well, the frosting called for a lot of sugar, so he added a little more milk. Huh. And now he discovered that the frosting was a little runny. He poured it over the cake anyway, and enough of it stuck to the cake that it looked frosted.

I really wish that I would have taken a picture, but between my dad and my husband, there's less than a quarter of it left now. The part I'm most impressed by though is that he absolutely didn't burn the cake at all. It was perfectly done! Yay, Dad!

Oh, and the best part of my day? On my way to work, Mister Man woke up and asked Daddy if he could call me to wish me a happy birthday. Just before I arrived at work, I had a very enthusiastic little boy calling to tell me how much he loved me and wishing me the bestest birthday ever. That and telling me that he's really sorry Daddy didn't take him to go shopping for me yet. At least he tossed in the yet! Of course, his perfect present is a toy dinosaur. If you recall, Daddy, Little Miss and my dad all got toy dinosaurs for their birthdays this summer.

Yeah, I may end up deleting this post, but I'll leave it up for a bit!

Halloween Recap

Boy, did we have fun last night! The whole evening was full of moments of note. But first, some pictures!

Spider Man flings his webs!

And he's doing something her, too, but I'm not sure what!

Yes, it's actually warm enough on October 31 to eat a picnic outside for lunch! Note: Little Miss is a witch here.

Our annual annual Halloween picture on the steps. Yes, Little Miss is now a princess. But not just any princess. She's the golden flying princess. With the tiara that I ended up wearing halfway through the night. I'm now officially a tiara wearing blogger!

Ahhh, you've noticed that it's now warm enough that we're not wearing jackets and short sleeves are fine. So weird. Oh, and masks are allowed for trick or treating but not at school, so Mister Man now has his mask on.

Sad Moment:
The families that were supposed to join us for trick or treating and dinner after both had to cancel. One had to fly to Cincinnati because her grandmother is dying and she needed to get there to say goodbye before it was too late. The other wasn't as dire, but both children have nasty colds, so she was out, too. This is the first year that another friend of mine that we have trick or treated with every year since we moved here has been in Kansas City. I really missed having her with me. Very weird walking the neighborhood by myself.

Surprising Moments:
Little Miss, the girl who last year cried her head off when I told her only four more houses and refused to stop trick or treating, decided about a third of the way through our neighborhood that she was done trick or treating. Fortunately since my neighborhood makes lots of circles, we were within sight of my house and I sent her home and watched until my husband took her inside (it was still daylight then).

Mister Man chose the option of going through the haunted house that one of our neighbors set up. He doesn't like being scared. And he did ok.

Neat Moment:

I went running yesterday (yeah... I brought all my stuff to Florida and went exactly zero times), so Mister Man was in the Kids Area while I was running. When I picked him up, one of the women who works there had painted his face. This isn't your usual thick blob where you squint and are told it's a sun and then figure out that yeah, I guess it's a sun. She's good. And apparently she did this out of the goodness of her heart, which was pretty neat. He ended up with a great spider on one cheek and a spiderweb on the other. He was so proud!


Unusual Moment:
Neither wee one wore a coat the whole time we were out. Little Miss had a short sleeved dress on. And I didn't need a jacket. It was warm out. It was 73 degrees when we started out. It was only 62 and 65 for a high in Orlando the last two days we were there. Those poor kids in the comfy Elmo costumes. They must have been roasting!

Phew Moments:
Little Miss decided that she'd be the golden princess for trick or treating. While the witch was fine for school, it required a turtleneck underneath it, and it was too warm for a turtleneck. Oh, and it was sort of too short for her this year. Oh, and then she decided that she was a flying princess. Who flies using pixie dust. And shoots webs from her hands. Yep, the golden flying princess slash spider. Creative little cuss, isn't she?

As of this morning, we have both our pumpkins. Nothing was smashed this year, and no shennanigans, even with a Friday night Halloween and tons of parties and bands of kids wandering around until after I'd gone to bed.

High Point:
The wee ones had no meltdowns the whole time we trick or treated. In fact, we covered the entire neighborhood. All 120 houses. And they held hands and crossed streets together and were overall very sweet. In fact, they even handed each other candy rather than just shoving their shares into their buckets and running along. Oh, and neither of them asked to eat any candy the whole time we were out.

Low Point:
Mister Man decided he had to go potty when we were very far from our house. I told him that we could either ask a neighbor (we don't know anyone on the part of the neighborhood, of course) to use their potty or find a dark house and head behind. He chose to ask a neighbor.

Creepy Moment:
The neighbor he asked gladly let him use the potty. And that neighbor appears to be a divorced dad who doesn't know how to keep house. I was embarrassed to be in the house. Especially when Mister Man didn't lift the seat and instead sat down. I didn't know he had to go that kind of potty. Whoops!

Entertaining Moments:
At one neighbor's house, the dad answering the door told Little Miss that she was really pretty. She didn't respond. Mister Man chirped in happily Thanks! Needless to say, we all cracked up. Mister Man totally didn't get it.

Whenever someone would tell Mister Man that he looked strong or asked him if he was Spiderman, he was very honest. Inside my costume, I'm just a regular boy or Those aren't my muscles; it's just part of the costume.

Little Miss eventually grew tired of her costume. Somewhere along the way, she took off her earrings and put them in her pumpkin bucket. She eventually explained that her tiara hurt, so off her head it went and onto mine. Then I noticed she was carrying her necklace in her hands, so I put it around my neck. What next? Why her dress of course! She complained near the end that her dress was hurting her. Since it was still over 60 degrees at 7:45, I had nothing on her under the dress save her Elmo underwear. I refused to let her take that off. Besides, it was way too small for me.

Oh, and one of our neighbors was having a party for her daughter and her daughter's friends. They're in the round part of the cul de sac, and we have an island in the middle of the cul de sac. Navigating this with cars parked along the edge of the street by teen drivers is probably not the easiest. I heard a giant crunch as we were walking back to our house at the end of trick or treating. One of the party guests had backed his dad's car into the brick mailbox. Whoops!

Record Breaking Moment:
The 342nd person who trick or treated at our house. And the 343rd. And the 344th. All the way up to the 372nd. Seriously. We had 372 trick or treaters tonight. And yes, the streets were packed with cars from people who drove in from other neighborhoods. I tried to take some pictures, but my camera didn't like taking pictures of the cars in the dark.

Aha Moment:
As we went on from house to house, some of the families offered the wee ones a choice of candy versus handing them a piece. Inevitably, they chose a Baby Ruth or Almond Joy or Peanut M&Ms or Mike & Ike or some other candy that wasn't a Twix or Snickers or Kit Kat. Next year, I'm teaching them how to choose candy!

Disappointing Moments:
I kept having to remind them to say thank you. They got the trick or treat pretty well, and they'd say it when I reminded them, but I had to remind them about 98% of the time. I was hoping that they'd be able to eventually remember on their own. Even more disappointing, I got many, many comments about how polite and well-mannered they were. If that was well-mannered, what were the rest of the kids doing?

I also was wearing Little Miss's ring. It was way too big for her, but she wanted to wear it when we first left the house. After she dropped it the nineteenth time, I put it on my finger. Not surprisingly, it was a bit small. And it fell off when I was transferring candy from their small buckets into my backpack. I heard a clank but didn't realize what it was until about twenty feet later when I realized it wasn't on my finger anymore. We went back, but I couldn't find it.

Yay Moment:
After we got back from trick or treating, I took a flashlight and went back to look for the ring. Unlike the (pretend) walkie-talkie we lost last year, I found the ring!

The Much Anticipated Wedding Recap!

Ok, I’m long overdue, but I finally have a wedding recap!

The bridesmaid and I flew to Houston and checked into our rooms, which were lovely. I had a gorgeous view from my room of the forest that is part of the acreage and is threaded with trails. I don’t think you can actually see any of the nicely cushioned walking/running trails in the picture, but they’re there.

We immediately headed up to the groom’s room, because he and the bride had so generously brought us barbeque from their dinner out, which was quite yummy. The whole weekend was filled with little nice things like that, which were all so appreciated.

On Friday, I went to the health club at the Houstonian, which was far swankier than any I’ve been to in the past but I won’t complain. I actually got lost trying to find the track and/or treadmills for my run. When I saw an employee and asked him where it was, he actually walked me all the way to the treadmills rather than giving me generic directions.

The run actually went well, which was good as I’d been worried since I’d never run on a treadmill before. The weird thing was getting off the treadmill. I felt like I was going to do a somersault at any point. I thought maybe it was because I was overheated, as I don’t sweat and frequently have problems when it’s warm out. I actually chose to run on the treadmill vs on the lovely paths outside because I was worried about overheating. As I was walking through the café to get back to the hotel, I actually got a huge drink of water from them, and that helped a little.

After I got home, I asked a few people who run frequently their thoughts on why I felt so off. I’ve had a variety of responses, from agreeing that it was probably from overheating to the theory that I was looking at something too close while running for 36 minutes and then walking and seeing things move for real threw me for a loop to the theory that I needed to have the treadmill on an incline (which I didn’t know, and I think it was set at 0%) or it would be as though I were running downhill. Needless to say, I haven’t had the opportunity to try again, but I’ll definitely be experimenting this summer!

Anyway, after I got back, my friend and a friend of her mom’s picked us up to take us to get our mani/pedis. Ahhh, I love the vibrating chair and foot and hand massage. Actually, I could skip the polish and just do that part!

As our nails were drying, my friend presented us with our bridesmaid gifts (ok, the two of us anyway, the third bridesmaid still hadn’t landed from Israel). All I have to say, is: take a look!

They are freshwater pearls that were hand picked by a friend of the bride’s mom and strung specifically for each necklace. Now I feel bad for my friends when I got married. It isn’t like I got them nothing, but I just got them a spa case with a variety of products. Oh well…

We then went to have Pho for lunch, which was yummy and busy. I finally met my friend’s sister for the first time (they get along fine, but she isn’t in the wedding because she wasn’t comfortable with it) and several of her aunts who ate with us. Apparently, this restaurant is in what used to be a K-Mart. I had my hopes up briefly as my friend was telling me about the Icee stand in the middle of the floor, but I soon learned she meant when it was a K-Mart, not now. Still yummy!

And after that, there was more as we headed to get some bubble tea (mmmm!) and chat for awhile before we headed back to the hotel to relax for a little while. The other bridesmaid and I went for a walk on the trails and also to go check out the pools (yes, pools – there were four) when we ran into the groom and one of his brothers, who we also hadn’t met before. It took us awhile to connect though, as they were banging on the inside of mirrored glass and didn’t get that we couldn’t see them.

Finally we converged and went to go check out the pools together. Wow. I really wish I’d taken a picture of them, but I didn’t have my camera with me and never thought to take one after that. They had a slide built into some rocks near a waterfall – which we went down of course! Plus, there was a lap pool, a relaxing pool, a hot tub and more. At this point, we were both regretting not bringing our kids (and respective parents to corral them) so they could have fun there and we could see them.

We then went to the rehearsal, which was entertaining. I got lost trying to find the room but eventually made it and wasn’t even close to the last person there, fortunately! It was an entertaining rehearsal, as the room wasn’t the same room the ceremony would be in, so it was somewhat makeshift. The third bridesmaid was quite obviously not going to pay attention, which showed when we went through the second time and she tried to stop and stand in my spot instead of at the other end of the dais.

The eleven year old ring bearer wore his sunglasses and did his Miami Vice shooting fingers snap gesture all the way up the aisle. Fortunately, he left that for this part and didn’t do it during the ceremony. The flower children (the eleven year old’s half siblings) were obviously very tired after flying in from Israel that day, and they weren’t really interested in participating. It’s always a risk to have very small children in the wedding, and they were obviously a bit overwhelmed with it.

Fortunately, by the end we all seemed to know where we were going and what we were doing, which helped. And the bride was a good sport, as she even carried the bow bouquet I’d made her at the shower. Her dad was so cute walking her down the aisle. I won’t say that same for the bride when she sucker punched the groom as he leaned in to kiss her (after insisting that he had the wrong woman when “checking” under the nonexistent veil).

Pretty quickly, it was time for the rehearsal dinner, which was a hoot. The groom’s parents hired buses to get us from the hotel to Fung’s Kitchen Seafood Restaurant. There we enjoyed nine delicious courses ranging from chicken lettuce wraps to lobster to sesame balls. Lucky me, I took only a few bites of the courses that sounded the most appealing to me versus eating a bunch of everything. Some of the guests were a touch too full by the end of the night to enjoy the sesame balls and melons, but not me!

My friend also had the cutest costumes made up for the wine bottles. They were supposed to be a girl in a kimono and a boy in traditional dress including a cap and ponytail, but the restaurant only put out the girl costumes, not that anyone who didn’t know about it in advance figured it out or would have cared anyway. They were adorable, and both my friend and I were sent home with some of the extras to give to our children to use as doll clothes.

Unlike a traditional rehearsal dinner where the bridal party and families were the ones invited, everyone from out of town plus all the in town relatives were at the rehearsal dinner, which meant there were in the neighborhood of 120 people there. It was a little chaotic, but in a good way. And it also gave the two dads a chance to practice their toasting for the actual wedding night. They literally toasted (and drank) at every single one of the 17 tables, with our table being the last one.

That would also explain the discussion on the bus ride home (which fortunately included only the groom, the groom’s dad, the other bridesmaid, one of the groom’s brothers, and me). When the groom’s dad starts insisting that he’s getting too much information on details of his son’s life he doesn’t care to know about, you know people have had too much to drink. The only good news is that the dad may or may not have remembered it the next day. I didn’t ask.

The next morning, we had until 11am before the hair and makeup artist was coming to do us up right. Obviously, that meant we had to spend some time at the pool. We were both careful not to spend enough time in the sun to get tan lines that would show in our dresses, but we definitely enjoyed the weather.

Given the humidity in Houston, we all vowed not to set foot outside the hotel once we had makeup and hair done... especially since we were having it done eight hours before the ceremony! Only the three of us plus the bride’s MIL were getting our hair and makeup done. The third bridesmaid (who had no interest in talking to us anyway or meeting or getting to know her new SIL) wasn’t going to get anything done and was just doing her own.

The bridesmaid and I decided that we were going to enjoy our time getting hair and makeup done and ordered up champagne, orange juice, munchies, tomato juice, and Tabasco (to go with my friend’s vodka). I think the bride was surprised, but not unhappy, about it. And it definitely helped us pass the time while were hung out.

The hair and makeup artist started with my hair. I explained that it tends to be very curly and won’t work if she tries to straighten it, especially in this humidity. I told her she could do whatever she and the bride wanted with my hair, which turned into a half up, half down ‘do. Once completed, I felt somewhat like a ‘50s housewife and it wasn’t my style, but it was cute and worked.

The MIL was done next, and we watched our words with her in the room. As she was leaving, she told us that she was going to watch her grandkids so the third bridesmaid could come to our room to hang out for awhile and get to know us. Oh, and she insisted on writing a check to cover the third bridesmaid’s share of the snacks we ordered (and yes, I did finally get a check from the MIL for the dress Sunday). We all saw through her statement though in that she was forcing the third bridesmaid to spend some time with us because even she saw how sad it was.

When the third bridesmaid came to chat with us, we could see that she had spent time at the pool, too, and not just because she was still wearing her swimsuit with a coverup. I was hoping that the tan lines wouldn’t be too obvious with her dress, and fortunately I never noticed them that night. I will say that I understand now the MIL’s comment that she insisted on buying not just the dress, shoes and jewelry (she chose large and black, which I thought was an interesting choice given our dresses) for the third bridesmaid, but also her undergarments, as I don’t think I saw her wearing any others the entire weekend, not that I was trying to look, mind you.

Anyway, once the makeup artist left at 3, we were on our own until pictures started before the ceremony. We got the bride checked into her room, ensured the dress had been appropriately delivered and … wait a minute! The dress was delivered, but there was no veil! Fortunately, after calling both the front desk and Saks to find out where the veil was, someone discovered it in the luggage room and brought it to us. Crisis number one averted!

We made our way down to the girls’ changing room where we proceeded to get ready for the wedding. It was quite entertaining to watch the flock of women and come into and run out of the room to talk to the bride as she was getting ready.

The other bridesmaid and I got her into her dress and shoes, and she looked gorgeous. The makeup artist returned and touched us up – especially my hair that was being forced to be far straighter than I likes. Somewhere in there, the flower person arrived, and the bridesmaid and I helped check the flowers.

It was at that point that we realized that the chuppah had no roof! When bringing it to the bride’s attention, she blew it off as not a big deal, but fortunately we know better. Without alarming her (sorry if you’re reading this!), we alerted others who could help us fix it. The florist got it and wasn’t going to leave until we had figured out a way to make a roof for the chuppah. Somewhere, someone found a tablecloth that was large enough to cover it, and the florist pinned it up with materials from his truck. By the time he finished, no one was the wiser, and I certainly hope that he got a huge tip!

Finally, it was time for the ceremony. The groom and his attendants awaited everyone on the dais. One by one, the bridesmaids walked up the center aisle. Then we waited for the flower boy (the girl insisted on being carried by her mom, who was the third bridesmaid). And waited. And finally saw him, sprinkling rose petals behind him, coming up the side aisle. Mental note to specify the route for small children in the future. Fortunately, it broke up some of the tension in the room, as we all awwwed at him.

Then the bride came with her dad, and she was handed off to the groom. She looked gorgeous and as happy as any bride should. The opening line of the ceremony mentioned the importance of the chuppah and what the roof of it stood for (ha! Again, I’m so glad we insisted that was fixed!). There were no hitches, no lost rings, no missed steps. And suddenly, my friends were married!

The reception was just as lovely, with a gorgeous cake that I would never have dreamed up in a million years but that I totally loved and would have had for my wedding cake had I seen it. Plus, there was the surprise poker groom’s cake and the tuxedo flowers (that I only tasted because I stole one off an untouched plate near the end of the ceremony).

The dinner was delicious, with the main course of a center cut filet and crab cake – two of my favorite foods. It went faster than I thought it was going to, but the wait for the cake was worth it. I had the coconut (it was coconut, right?) cake that was supposed to have raspberry filling. Mine lacked the filling, as it was a tiny corner piece, but I snagged some of the filling from my husband’s piece who so generously shared when his attention was diverted. To be fair, I did give him my entire groom’s cake piece, as I’m not a fan of chocolate cake.

Once the dining was over, the band started to play, loudly as you’d expect at any public event. This was all the groom’s doing, and the Lost Boys play 80s music, which I’m totally good with. I think I danced for almost the entire time, with maybe one five or so minute break. The only downside is that there were literally no slow songs to dance to, which was a bit of a bummer. The gamut of songs they played was incredible though, and they did a great job, even though most of the guests left once cake was served. Personally, I don’t get leaving a wedding that early, but I’ve been to enough where people head out once cake is served. I don’t remember that really happening at my wedding so much, but I could have faulty recall there, too.

I will say that everything there was fantastic and well done. If anyone is ever getting married in the Houston area and needs some referrals of wedding vendors, I can definitely speak to the strengths and weaknesses of those that were used by my friend.

Finally, we got to the toasts. The co-best men gave their spiel, and I immediately was grateful that I had a written copy of mine with me as I listened to them. Then a friend of the groom’s parents gave his toast (and three times called the groom by the wrong name, which apparently was not an inside joke), which he does at every function where the families are together. Finally, it was my turn. I gave my toast and went to hug the bride. At which point I found out that I’d made her cry! That’s the mark of a good toast in my book, and it made my night to know that I’d touched her.

The next morning, we had a brunch hosted by the bride’s family at a house on the hotel grounds. Again, everyone from out of town, plus all the relatives were invited, so you can imagine the mass of people. When I had gotten the original invitation to the brunch, I had assumed it would be more formal, with food served, the hosts saying a few words, everyone there at the same time, etc.

The way they actually did it was very different, but it worked. The whole Manor House was rented out, and it was a beautiful spread of a buffet. People came in and left when they chose between 10 and 12, and they simply sat in a room at a table that appealed to them. The only disappointment I had was that I really had to search out the parents and in-laws to thank them again as I was leaving. The bride and groom chose to sit at my table, at least, so that made things easy!

Oh, and that whole outfit I’m wearing in the pictures at brunch… the whole thing is going. I never realized how unflattering that blouse is, but the magic of Kodak will certainly clear that up. I’m not sure I want any more pictures of me in any clothes after that! And the pants… well, as I was packing everything up in the bathroom, my makeup slipped off the counter and shattered on the floor. Oh yeah, and it splattered all over the legs of my pants (yep, before breakfast, yay!). I’ve tried everything I can think of to get the makeup out of the pants (that I’d worn once before that Sunday), but they’re trashed. If anyone has any suggestions, I’d love to hear them, but I’m not holding my breath.

Ok, and here’s my moment to be petty. The third bridesmaid did not choose a dress that flattered her. The primary issue is that she insisted on ordering a size 8, yet she is larger than I am (and I didn’t order an 8). With an empire neckline and A-line skirt, she didn’t have the most forgiving dress. We found out later that the MIL had to rip out the lining in order for her to be able to zip the dress. And she still (in the words of a friend of mine) looked like an overstuffed sausage in the dress. Another word of caution for those who are getting caught up in numbers instead of what really fits. While my dress turned out to be slightly too large even after taking it in some, I’m still thrilled that it fit well enough to not make me look like an immense cow.

And now, for the toast (and no, I didn’t write it on the plane. I actually wrote it Friday morning while waiting for the bride to pick us up to get our mani/pedis – but I did find the time to write it at least!):

For those of you who don’t know me, my name is Michelle. Thank you to Mr. and Mrs. K and Mr. and Mrs. R for such a lovely evening tonight, and to J and A for inviting me to be a part of it.

I’ve known J since she graduated from business school and started working at the same consulting company I did ten years ago. We’ve been through a lot together, and I couldn’t be happier for her tonight.

You couldn’t ask for a better friend than J. She is incredibly generous and always willing to help out. She’s never gone on a trip and not come back with some sort of gift for me, for my children, for my kitchen, or for whoever she thought might enjoy something she saw. She never comes to my house empty-handed, although all I ask of her is some company.

(This was directed at J) Over the years of spending time in each other’s company, we’ve had lots of fun, from someone offering to buy you at a Bears game to more cooking classes than we can count to endless Slurpee’s from the Seven-Eleven across from Wrigley that we’d enjoy at Cubs’ games. We’ve both had our share of dating issues and definitely kissed our share of frogs. In the past, we’ve joked that we are freak magnets, but tonight you’ve proven that this isn’t true.

It’s time to say goodbye to bad blind dates and awkward meetings in bars and to Ivy League dinners. In the past, there have been guys you’ve dated who we knew weren’t the one, but we always supported you. When you started talking about A, there was something different.

It’s far more than that, however. A and J are a great match. Each has quirks, but those quirks complement each other. A is a rock for J when she needs one, and J has an excuse to really cook with A. They both challenge each other intellectually and keep each other on their toes, which should provide years of entertainment for both them and those of us who are around them. But most importantly, J and A make each other happy, and you can’t ask for more than that.

I always knew that there was a man out there for J who would truly understand her and love her the way she deserves, and I’m so glad to see that she waited to find A, and that he is all those things for her. It may have been many years in the making, but A was certainly worth waiting for. It is so great to finally see you so happy.

Best wishes to the happy couple on their wedding day. May your love for each other grow with each passing year and blossom into your own family.