Stay OUT Of My Way!

Everyone has pet peeves, things that people do or say that just grrrrrrrrrrrrATE on their nerves. Everyone's pet peeves are different, which makes it easier for all of us to annoy each other, of course, but I'm realizing that I have some doozies.

Top Ten Pet Peeves:

#10 I hate it when people park in a handicapped spot when they shouldn't.
This was a major irritation to me last year when the moms at Little Miss's preschool would park in the handicapped spots -- including the ones that weren't spots because they were all whited out to give the handicapped people enough room to get in and out -- because they were closer to the sidewalk. And they'd do this even before other spots were filled. And they'd do this even though parking on the street would actually have them closer to the door. Fortunately, we're at a different preschool this year, and my blood pressure thanks me for it. But I still see it periodically elsewhere.

#9 Today's version of screwball comedies.
Did we have stupid movies when I was growing up? Sure, Spaceballs made no sense. Dirty Rotten Scoundrels was stupid. The Vacation movies were totally campy. Caddyshack was a bit over the top. But they were good clean fun.

Now? Honestly, I can't even bring myself to go watch the comedies today. They're vulgar and potty humor. And those are the good points. Really, can't we be clever without resorting to this? Have we sunk so low?

#8 Hotels that don't have sleep timers on their flippers.
I know you aren't supposed to read in bed, and I know you aren't supposed to watch tv in bed -- something about it making it hard to fall asleep or something. But I do this every night. It's my way of unwinding. I read a newspaper or magazine or -- if I'm really lucky -- a book while having the Food Network on in the background. When I'm relaxed enough for sleep, I turn off the light and set down the magazine. The tv goes off on its own, and I listen to it somewhat as I fall asleep.

Except if I'm in a hotel that doesn't have a sleep timer on the flipper. Or worse yet, it has a button for the sleep timer but the button doesn't function. Then I'm stuck with the tv on. Sometime in the middle of the night, I have to wake up enough to turn it off and then manage to fall back asleep. Really, this has been a standard function on tvs for decades. Why can't hotels all have it, too?

#7 Tin foil and plastic wrap.
I'm left-handed, and did you know that both of those items are made for right-handed people? Seriously, go try to rip off a sheet of either using your left hand to rip and right hand to hold the box. Go ahead, I'll wait.

See, it just ripped into an ugly crumpled up mess, didn't it? I finally learned how to do it right-handed, but it feels so wrong! Would it really be that hard to make it work both-handed?

#6 Grammatical errors, especially the simple ones.
I know it's been a long time since fifth grade English, but certain things drive me batty.

Its is a possessive pronoun. It's is a contraction of the words it is. They are not interchangeable.

Compliment is when you say something nice to a person. Complement is when something goes well with or improves upon something else. Totally different. Ketchup cannot compliment a hot dog (and not only because ketchup and hot dogs should never meet) because it can't talk.

Incentivize is not a word. Incentification is not a word. Incentivize is not a word.

And I'll spare you the lecture. Most of you don't write for the paper I read that has grammatical errors strewn about it.

#5 People who gloat when they win.
I remember learning about playing games fairly when I was just a small child. Do I like winning? Heck yeah. I also like playing the game again, which means that I don't rub it in people's faces when I win. Or take it too seriously when I lose, for that matter.

The people who play in my husband's baseball league have forgotten that rule. There is a guy who was tossed from the league last year from threatening bodily harm to an ump one too many times. And the cursing and helmet tossing that goes on? You'd think it was life or death. I see examples of this all the time, and it really saddens me.

Read between the lines if you will, but if you can't win nicely no one wants to play with you, and that's a really lonely life. And not healthy for the greater community.

#4 My husband's driving.
Ok, so this may be a common one, I'll admit.

When he sees a red light ahead, does he slow down? Nooooo, he keeps going at the same rate of speed and then has to jerk to a stop. Guess how he starts up from a stop!

The left lane is his home, regardless of how quickly he is going in relation to others or how few people are on the road. It's illegal (see pet peeve #10) and it's just not a good idea in general. And he refuses to admit that it's illegal to drive in the left lane when not passing. It is. I looked it up.

Oh, and he doesn't use a turn signal when "there aren't others who need to know" in his mind or come to a full stop if there aren't other cars around. When the wee ones are in the car, I feel it's important to follow the letter of the law so that they pick up on good driving habits and are safer drivers as they get older. *sigh*

#3 What happened to a good, old-fashioned turn signal?
There's a light near my house where the smaller road turns onto the municpal highway. The sounthbound part of the road mostly has people turning left but some who go straight. They get a left arrow to start the signal. The northbound people tend to go both left, right and straight. And when I come northbound wanting to turn left to get to my house, I have people approaching the intersection who appear to be going straight, and so I wait since I don't want to crash into someone else. Suddenly the car veers to its left and *gasp* turns. Silly me for waiting. Why would I expect notification that it would be safe for me to turn.

#2 Finger and toe nail clipping freak me out.
Seriously, it's like nails on a chalkboard. It actually hurts me to hear that noise. And do you want to know how often I go to work and hear people sitting in their little areas clip clip clipping away? First, it's completely inappropriate and just plain gross to do personal grooming while sitting at your desk working, but second dude, everyone can hear you. ICK!

And you wonder why my husband has the sole finger and toenail clipping responsibilities for the wee ones. And he has to do it upstairs in the bathroom. With the door closed. And the fan on. And I need to be in the basement.

#1 Why does Little Miss feel the need to poop in her pants?
She's potty trained. She's totally potty trained and has been for months. Back in August or so, we were having a little issue with it where she'd leave streaks in her underwear. We resolved it. My husband of course tried bribing her with candy which meant she asked for candy morning noon and night -- not that I predicted this or anything, so I nipped that in the bud -- and came down on the mean mommy strategy of Little Miss who KNOWS to ask and is totally potty trained loses two favorite toys when she poops in her underwear. If she finishes in the potty, she earns one back. It worked beautifully, and she's been totally fine since.

Ok, until Tuesday morning when there was not just a streak in her night time Pull-Up but a full on poop. She was ver sad and told me that she'd called for me in the night but that I hadn't come. I felt sorry for her and said it was ok. Tuesday after nap? Another full poop in the Pull-Up. Tuesday night after dinner? ANOTHER one. Today when my mom got her home from daycare? Yep. And then forty-five minutes later playing in the basement? Uh-huh. Needless to say, my dresser is a little full right now, and her bedroom is looking more empty.

Why, oh WHY, has she decided that it's ok to poop in her pants? She knows what she's doing, and she knows to ask. Here's hoping my little chat with her tonight helps the issue -- and the chat was a positive one about how she knows how to do this and can just ask for help.

So how about you? What are your biggest pet peeves?