Stay Debt Free Over The Holidays

It's already Cyber Monday, and I've heard nothing on the radio today but about how much money people are going to be spending today - an estimate of over $1.5 billion - and more to come.  With the most possible shopping days before Christmas, retailers are exhorting people to make the most of them.  And making the most of them is going to put a lot of people into unnecessary debt.

My gift to you this year?  My suggestions and tips on how to avoid sliding into debt over the holidays.

1. Holidays are about people - or should be.  Have conversations with your family about what really matters to you and what you want most.  Explain to your son that this year you won't be buying a new video game console, but you'll offer $25 or $50 towards buying it.  Discuss with your spouse whether you really want to exchange gifts or maybe set strict spending limits - and stick to them.  Explain to your kids that they will receive fewer gifts this year because the focus is shifting.  The wee ones know that Jesus got three gifts, and they get three gifts.  And they're fine with that.

2.  With extended family members or groups of friends where you regularly exchange gifts, have a similar conversation.  Do you want to exchange gifts?  Can you maybe simply purchase gifts for the kids and not the adults?  What about drawing names and buying one gift for someone in the group instead of each buying a gift for every person?  Have you ever though of doing a white elephant exchange with a $5 or $10 limit?  They are so much fun.

3.  Don't add anyone else to your gift giving list.  I know you love you new best friend or there's someone who you could start the gift exchange with, but ... don't.  In all likelihood they need a gift from you just as much as you need one from them, so save the cash on both sides.  Go out for a drink or dinner instead.  Bake cookies and share them.  But don't start giving more gifts if you can help it.

4.  Don't just spend money, raise it.  If I look around my house, I see so many things that I no longer need or want - from gifts that people gave me to books the wee ones no longer read to clothes they've outgrown to kitchen gadgets I don't use.  The season for garage sales is over in Chicago, but Craigslist is your friend.  So is eBay.  And I told you about the awesome Buy/Sell/Trade groups on Facebook.  If you're going to spend money, make sure you have it.

5.  Speaking of those gifts people gave you that you've never actually opened or used... regift.  I have no issues receiving an item that someone else received as a gift that didn't fit for them so long as it is a good fit for me.  If you don't cook and received an immersion blender and need to get me something, pass that sucker along.  No one will know - or care (or if they do, shame on them) - and this is a great way to upcycle items that are otherwise just taking up space.

6.  Put away the credit cards.  This one is an obvious one, I suppose.  It's really easy to forget how much you're spending when you don't have to open your wallet and remove the green.  In fact, figure out how much you can afford to spend, put it in an envelope marked "Christmas money" and use that to buy everything.  If you run out, you're done.  And if you have some left over, deposit in the bank.  It is not a windfall.  It's your hard earned money that you can use for something else you really need later.

7.  Create your own gifts.  Giving the gift of time or talent is wonderful.  So many of us have more than we need.  Instead of another... thing, give people you.  Create a gift certificate for an hour of organizing or a home cooked dinner or babysitting or three hours of window cleaning or anything that you can do that your recipient would appreciate.  Maybe it's a date to the movies.  Maybe it's reading to your niece before bedtime.  Those are the gifts that people remember fifteen years from now.  Those are the ones I want to receive.

8.  Buy the large gift baskets and split them up.  I do this all the time, especially for gifts I need to purchase for teachers and therapists where all of a sudden, I have to purchase 11 more gifts for the people who do so much for my children.  If I buy a large gift basket, I suddenly have a bunch of gifts that are much cheaper than they were individually.  And they are often pre-wrapped very prettily, which saves me time.

9.  Search for coupons for every item you want to buy.  It's amazing what's out there.  I was looking for a Black & Decker smart battery charger (or something similar) for my car the other day.  I first found one for $157.  After searching and coupons, I managed to bring the price down for the same model to $84.53.  Search.  Whether you're buying offline or on, search for a coupon both for the item and for retailers where you might purchase it.

10. Save your receipts.  You may have thought you got the best deal ever when you went shopping on Black Friday.  But maybe you didn't.  Or maybe that perfect gift wasn't perfect and now you've found the perfect gift - and it's cheaper.  Save your receipts so that you can return any unwanted items that you bought in the heat of the moment and you can bring back the items that are now cheaper at another retailer.  Plus, many retailers will credit you with the newly discounted price within a certain time period (usually two weeks) if they now sell it for a lower price.  You simply have to bring in your receipt, and they'll credit you for that amount.

I'm staying out of debt this holiday season - and beyond.  What are your tips beyond the ten I've shared here?

Ten Ways To Make Your Photos Blogworthy

Before BlogHer in New York, I attended Blographer, a first time event put on by Adorama.  It was a full day session focused on photography, specifically blog photography.  And you all know I can use all the help I can get in that area!

The first session was on ten ways to make your photos blogworthy, featuring Amanda Bottoms and Erin Cobb.  I learned so much that my head is still spinning.  And the almost two hours of this session?  It wasn't nearly enough.

Erin - You might know that in the south we say "Bless your heart," but here's the more authentic Huntsville. It is "God love her," so you can use those two things. "Bless her heart, but she doesn't know what she's doing up on stage, bless her heart."

I'm going to tell you a little about my blog and my journey to where I am now. I started to blog when my daughter was born in 2006 - for my mother, and that was it. I was in Colorado and had a baby. I never had any aspirations beyond that. I had a little point and shoot and that was great. I wanted something better, and it went from there.

About 10 months after I started blogging, a picture I took of my daughter won the BabyGap contest. Then all of a sudden, people cared about my blog, so it started getting hits and my friends and friends of friends started saying, "Can you take pictures of my child?" I decided I will, but you have to pay me. I started a photography business and moved to Alabama. I have a blog for my life and a blog for my business. 

Huntsville is the land of engineers - the largest per capita in the country. How do you know an outgoing engineer? He looks at other people's shoes. How do you know an outgoing blogger? She looks at other people's phones....

 Amanda - I am a full time blogger. I also live in Huntsville with my husband and two dogs. My photography and blog are both food and travel oriented. My blog focuses a lot on food, travel, and landscape, with a lot of desserts. That's what I take pictures of.

Erin - Empower your images to tell your story. I'm going to tell you a little about each of my blogs. The Pig Bear is my personal blog. I feel like whatever you're blogging about, food, shoes, engineers, work, kids, you have a story to tell. You have to have something you want to say to the world. The Pig Bear is the story of my family's life. There is a constant theme that runs through the blog, that life is fun and quirky and real and colorful. That's the story of my personal blog.

When I say it's real, we know everyone's' life has crappy stuff in it. I try to document that a little, but that's not what I want to remember about my life. I do blog positively knowing that my children will read it someday, and I want them to know that I treasure them. This is the story I want to remember.

My other blog is my business blog. My clients can go to my personal blog and my friends and readers can go to my business blog, but I keep them separate. I don't want my client's grandmother to have to read about my four year old's fit. The story I want to tell here is about a fun, exciting client experience.

I'm conscious with both these blogs who my audience it. On my personal blog, it's still my mom and my sister, and my friends and the guy who googled pig bear. On the business blog, it's my clients, my potential clients, other photographers, and the most important audience for me is the potential clients. I want to blog about this fun and engaging client experience to make people want to call me. If you know the overarching message you want to get across, you already know the images you need to capture and how you need to reinforce the story.

I always want to keep the things that I share in line with my overarching story. We want to remember that we're happy, that my house is warm, that we're quirky. And that we're real. The picture of my child crying is real, and we have to remember that, too. I try to feel the realness, too. On my business blog, I want to keep it engaging and fun. What mother of a teenage boy doesn't want to see her son mugging up with her to the camera? That's what I want to show on my business blog.

You know the story you want to tell, and now you have all these tools in your toolbox to tell that story. The trick is how to tell that story to your advantage. You've got perspective, the way you approach the scene in front of you - high or wide, close up or not, you've got shutter speed and aperture, you've got composition and storyboards - the series of images you use to reinforce your story.

A little about perspective. 
When you approach whatever you are photographing, before I take that shot, I am thinking, "What do I want to tell? What is the story here? What do I want to tell?" If I were sitting right here, there is the story that the girl in front is scared and everyone is staring at her, so I'd want to take a picture of me up front with some of us in the audience. I'm not just shooting everything. I'm thinking about what story I want to tell and then finding the images for this.

This picture (on the screen during the presentation - showing a baby in focus with the top of a little boy's head who is holding the baby) is about Baby Jude and being loved and adored. It's focused on him with my son there but not showing the child loving on him. About five minutes later, this is Ephraim loving on Baby Jude (focused on the boy's face, with the sleeping baby in the picture but not the focus), so it's focused on him and his face with Jude there just to show what he's loving.

You can use objects in your view to show your perspective. Having a door in the background really gives that perspective of peeking around a door. Closer in really gives that perspective of being a part of the scene. Really focusing on the eyes with a big aperture will give you a lot of attitude from the subject of what she can do.

Find the Best Light 
Amanda - One of the best tools you have in your toolbox is the light. Finding where the light is coming from, how it hits your subject, honestly it's not something I thought about at first. I didn’t see where it showcases the highlights and the shadows. It took a long time for me to learn to take the best photos to evoke emotion.  I have to find the best light in my house and move things to that area. It can take things from dull and flat with flash lighting to dramatic if you have shadows and highlights.

This is my kitchen (another photo onscreen), where I take most of the photos in my house. That's good since I take a lot of photos of food. I get a lot of natural light from the big window. I get the sun in the morning. Right after the sunspot goes away, it's completely flooded in the room. I turn off all other lights in the house because you don't want any competing light because that's going to mess up your white balance. I like to have the light just flooding the picture.  If I don't have enough light, I will move the table by the window to get as much light as I can possibly have.

Here's an example of a picture I took in that lighting. The light hits the food directly from the side and highlights the chocolate. What's also great about the table is I love being able to just walk around the table and look to see where the light is hitting. The first picture shows the light hitting it from the side. The next photo has it hitting from the back where it has shadows in the front where it then highlights the frosting on the macaroons.

Every picture you ever drew of an apple has the shiny spot on it. We drew it in because our brains know. Find the shiny spot - the interesting highlights - to take the photo. Light coming from the top just isn't as interesting as light coming from the side or backlight. If you don't have a good shiny spot, look for the shadows. You can see them up front on the won ton wrappers, because if you have front lighting, you can't see the dimension as well.

That's indoor lighting. Now if you're outside, look for some shade to take pictures, but you want to treat it like that big window. Look for a lot of sun and then move just out of it into shade. You don't want to see a bright patch of sun in your background because that will be way too bright. It's the same type of light as indoors with full natural light. Then walk around and see before you even take your picture to see where the best light is. That way you can take 8 instead of 50 photos to get a winner.  Look to see where the highlights are hitting the subject. Have the person look at you to see where the catch lights hit their eyes, and that's where you want to take that photo.

If you're ever outside and want to get that beautiful landscape shot with a bright blue sky, shoot with the sun behind you, hitting whatever you want to photograph. Shooting towards the sun will give you a white blown out sky. Turn a 180, and you'll have a bright blue sky that's illuminated with gorgeous shadows and reflections. For outdoor shooting if you do want to have the sun behind someone, use the popup flash on your camera. The bright light coming in will make the person completely silhouetted. 

Expose for the light. Take your camera to where you can just see the sky and hold down the shutter to focus, then move down so items are silhouetted as you want. It depends on what you want to see. Move your subjects to the light.

This photo was taken in a pitch black restaurant where we could barely see the food (gorgeous picture of a dinner that looks fully lit). We want to go out to eat during normal times, but we want to take pictures of our food anyway. You could always use your flash, but I like light coming in from other directions. I have the candle that I moved closer to the food. There is a bright light to the side, where I had a friend turn on her phone to illuminate the food, and it looks like daylight. Most phones have a flashlight app, but that would be too harsh. Hold it at a high angle, to a blank browser page so it's a white screen.

Be Consistent in Style & Skill 
Erin - I feel like when I am about to click on Amanda’s blog, I know exactly what I'm going to see. You have an expectation of a brand and what you'll get from it. Use GAP, Diet Coke, and Google as examples. You know how it will make you feel.

Every person is a brand; every baby has a blog. Did you know that two years ago, 92% of two year olds and under had an online footprint from a picture or a name on the internet? When someone sees you coming, they have a thought about how they're going to feel about you, what you're going to say, or how you're going to say it. It's the same thing with your blog and the pictures you put on your blog.

It could not be more important for you to be consistent with your style and skill. There's nothing more frustrating than not knowing how many pictures they're going to put up or if they're going to be good or not. Really establish who they are and what they do. You have an expectation. When my clients come to my business bog, they know they'll see cute families and girls, adorable babies, and happy images.

First, set the expectation through your images what their experience is going to be, then live up to it every time. On my personal blog, I’ve established that story. It's going to be warm and fun and engaging. It's going to be a story in the photos. You're working with this in every post to live up to the expectation to reaffirm the brand. You may not think you have one, but you do.

Don't forget about that little bit of fun and spark every now and then. Even Coke has Vanilla Coke or Coke with Lime. Don't forget about that element of surprise. You know the product is reliable, but there's an extra little fun sometimes. You can do that on your blog, too, and it will help keep them coming back.

Use Aperture to Focus on Important Elements 

Amanda - One of the tools you have is aperture. There are things you want a lot in focus and others that you want just a little in focus. Let me tell you a little about aperture; it controls whether you have a lot or a little in focus, if it's a blurry background or whether you have it all in there. If you have a small number (f2.8) it's open wide and the background will be blurry. If it's a larger number, then it will be all in focus. It's AV in Canon and A in Nikon (and Sony) then turn the dial down as far down as you can go. One of my favorites is the Canon 50mm 1.8 lens that's about $100. It's how I get the backgrounds to beautifully blurry.

When you're doing a blurry background, make sure it's an interesting background. If it's just a white or solid background, it won't have bokeh or be interesting. A picture of perfume sitting in front of a ton of jewelry is reflecting light off the beads. Look for repetitive objects, trees and bushes are fabulous and Christmas lights are great, too. Set it up before you take your shot. That's what makes great bokeh.

If you want everything in focus, you can go up to 22. Turn the dial all the way up to do that. It's a narrow aperture with just a little light coming through, so you need a lot of light to come through. That will bring everything into focus. This is something that I use a lot for landscapes. I want the story to include everything. One of my favorite things about using a high F number like 22 is that if you're taking a picture of the sun or any kind of light, it will create that awesome sun flare. It works all the time whether it's coming through trees or shooting straight at the sun. It works at night with streetlights, too.

Use your Shutter Speed to Dramatically Freeze or Blur Motion 
Amanda - You can use shutter speed to tell your story to either dramatically freeze or blur and slow down motion. When I go outside and I want to take photos of action, the first thing I do it put my camera in Shutter Priority Mode - TV in Cannon and S in Nikon (P for Sony). If you see inch marks on your screen, that's actually seconds for your shutter speed. You need a lot of light because the shutter doesn't open as wide. I turn it to 500 and, you'll capture the action. A high number is a fast shutter speed and it will freeze. The camera will handle everything else but the shutter speed.

On the flip side of that, you can use an extremely slow shutter speed to create a dramatic motion effect, but you need a tripod or something to keep it steady. It's recording the whole time the shutter is open for a quarter of a second or five seconds or thirty seconds. Nothing else in the background (of a photograph shown on the screen) moves but the water, so the background is in focus but the water is blurry. If you move at all, then it won't work. This is great for places that are action central where you don't want to have people or cars in the photo but instead shows the image you want to see.

If you're going to use a tripod, use a quick self-timer mode like 2 seconds or something. Any shake or movement on the camera will shake or blur it. Even pressing the shutter button will shake the camera. I press the shutter then get away from the camera while it's taking so the camera has time to steady itself.

The next time you're taking a photo, think about what images might benefit from a slow shutter speed. If I'm going to do photos of water, I love a slow shutter speed because it gives a slow dreamy effect. The water is choppy and looks flat with no interest to it. There are always railings in places I seem to go, where I can turn on the self-timer and set the shutter speed and let it record. It makes a more interesting picture. If you shoot in manual mode, you can up the aperture to get sunburst, too.

Select Images That Support Your Style/Brand 
Erin - You've taken all these pictures and now need to choose which ones to share that support your brand. I feel like I can see a picture on the Internet and know Amanda took that photo. There is a very signature look. I know that feels daunting if you aren't super familiar with your camera. If you’re consistent over time and figure out what you like, you'll find what's consistent with your brand.  Once you have defined your style and brand, work with each post to enhance and strengthen it. Whatever your style is, make it your goal that your images be instantly recognizable even without your name attached.

With a blog, you don't really know exactly who is reading your blog. You can look at Google stats, but it doesn't tell everything. When it comes to blogging, think about the story first - and mine typically are of children, family and people. I just don't take photos, or care to take photos, without people. I typically know the story I want to tell.

Do you ever see interactions where you want to freeze them and they're so poignant or special or funny? That's the story I want to grab. I don't necessarily know the tone that my blog post will take. I don't know when I take that picture of my kids snuggled in the bed on a Saturday if I’m going to go funny or poignant with it. It's when I'm editing the photos that I really start to form the tone and post in my mind. I take the images and know the story then craft the post around it.

The tone influences the number of images I share and the order in which I share them. If I'm doing a story about my day in New York or Blographer, then I'll share a lot of pictures and punctuate it with information. Storytelling posts do really well with lots of images. The sweet or poignant stories tend to not need as many images.

Some of the blogs I really like frustrate me because I feel like a quarter of the way through the blog post, it has already told the story and it just goes on and on. It feels like I already know this story and it's just too sweet. If it's sweet, keep it short. It gets too heavy when it's serious. Keep it short. With storytelling, you can use more images to tell the story. This is my husband and daughter playing soccer. My daughter has learned to do the "What's that?" to my husband who plays the fool for her.

Oftentimes, leaving an image out can do more for your blog than putting it in? Does this image support my story without being redundant? It may just be so cute and a different angle, but no one cares if it's a different angle. Be sure that each image you choose supports without retelling. Does it bring something new to the story?

Is it safe or anonymous enough to be respectful of friends and family? Everyone has a different line, and you have to know that. Most people I'm photographing know that I'm going to put things on the blog, and if they don't want up, they'll tell me. Nothing will make your images less blogworthy than friends and family not wanting to be up there.

Shoot with Skill and Edit for Impact 
Erin - I’m going to tell you something embarrassing about me. In 2005, my daughter was born. I learned everything my point and shoot, including shooting in manual mode. I knew all it could do. Then I decided it was time for a new camera and got a Canon Rebel. I had no aspirations to be a photographer, so I started researching online. I had no idea that Photoshop existed. I didn't know about image editing at all. I saw these pictures, in a time where oversaturation was big, and I spent a good six months working my camera to look like these photos that I know now had been edited.

I'm really glad I did this though because it taught me to shoot with skill. When I discovered Photoshop and I can edit, that's great, but I still know how to take that photograph. My editing philosophy is that Photoshop is like makeup. It works best when it looks like you're not using any. You don't want people to walk into a room and say, "Wow, did you see her eyeliner?" You want them to notice your eyes.

If you really like to go for it in Photoshop, then go for it. I sell a Photoshop product that teaches people to use it like I do, so I'm not bashing Photoshop. I want images to point back to your story and not to the editing that you did. You want them to notice your image.

Lighten to emphasize Detail 
Amanda - The first thing is the light. I personally think that most photos need a little bit of lightening. You can do this in editing photo tool you have from Picasa or just uploading it somewhere. Everyone is going to have a tool to lighten. It's when it's a little bit brighter that lets you emphasize your detail and enhance it. You don't want to do it too bright because I look at blogs and look at things where it's just too bright all the time.  It's always ok to shoot just a little darker than you think because you can fix that. You can't really do too much when it's too bright and light.

Train your eye to recognize proper white balance 
Amanda - There's nothing worse than seeing a picture that is great but just a little too blue or just a little too yellow. All I do when it's a little too blue is add a little warmth. It looks like I also lightened it or saturated it, but I didn't. It instantly adds so much to just add a little warmth. If a plate has anything white in your photo, use that as your guide. If you aren't sure, start playing around with a photo to see what makes it look better or worse. If it's too yellow, you can cool it down a bit, which will help you see the colors a little better. The items just pop out a little bit more just from adjusting the white balance.

Finally - Prepare properly for the Web 
Erin - Back when I discovered about editing, I learned about RAW. Photographers have a huge debate about this. I started shooting in RAW. I kept dumping all these RAW files with no in camera processing with all the original data in there, which gives you more freedom to change them, but then all I was doing was to go into a RAW processor without touching any of the sliders and turning them into .jpgs. That wasted so much time for me. And now I shoot for the last 5 years shooting in jpg.  I say this because RAW is a superior file type. It is. But if you find yourself pulling your RAW files into your converter and not doing anything with them, save yourself time and heartache by shooting in .jpg.

The last thing is preparing for the web. Karen Russell lives in Oregon and teaches online and in person. I went out to see her about two years ago about my editing processes. We spent time together, and it was great. "There was something else," she kept saying that I was doing to make my photos better. After days, we decided to do a post about me being out there. I started to prepare mine for the web. And that's where she figured out what I'm doing differently.

I think that there are bloggers who don't know that you have the option to prepare your file for proper display on the web. It resizes to a smaller file size so it uploads faster, and when you put them up there that way, it looks just a little softer and smoother. The web does something different from when you print it.

If you sharpen it properly for the web, suddenly you'll figure out how much better it looks. I have a web sharpen action that I will give to anyone who emails me. Do some research into this if you aren't already properly preparing your images for the web. There are benefits and drawbacks to this. One of the benefits is that you can upload them faster because they're smaller. If people were to download your images to your computer and print them, then they can't print a 16x20 from your web file because it will look terrible. Another benefit is that your images will look sharper and display better for your audience.

A drawback is to think about the purpose of your blog. If your purpose is to document your blog and then slurp it and put it into a blog book that you can save as your family history. If you have resized all your photos for the web, every single one of your files will have to be replaced manually because you will get messages that they won't print well. If your purpose is to present your images in the best way possible or you don't mind putting in the extra time, then go ahead and do this. As far as the optimal pixel size, it depends on your blog and whatever site you're putting them up on. Amanda will discuss this.

Question and Answer
Audience: Do you watermark your photos? 
Erin - On my personal blog, I have given up the fight on my personal blog because it takes a lot of time. I do not watermark my images. I try to make them inaccessible by disabling right click. There is a great picture of mine with a couple horrible quotes that is floating around the web. Those sorts of annoying thing happen. On my business blog, I have my logo on every picture that is resized for the web and has a border around them. I don't know if this is the right answer, but it's what I do.
Amanda - I depends on what image you want to present. If that's what you want to do, go for it. A lot of cameras now will include your copyright information on every picture you take.

Audience: As a photographer and a blogger, are you calibrating your pictures for print?
Erin - I am calibrating my pictures for print. Unless you're a photographer, no one else notices it or cares.
Amanda - My philosophy in life is to get it to 95%, and that's good enough. I get it there and then just don't care about that last 5%.
Erin - I am a professional photography making my money from selling pictures, Amanda is a professional blogger.

Audience: With both a personal and a business blog, how do much time do you spend?
Erin - I've toyed with putting them together. I do a sneak peek for every session, and I do three sessions a week. I also do some filler things. I try to blog on my personal blog every other day or so, but that falls to the side when I get busy. I spend 5 to 6 hours a week blogging. My business has been in my house until last month, so now I'm trying to really recommit my evenings to things I want to do, so I blog on my personal blog more often.

Audience: Do you ever put personal stories on your business site?
Erin - I may put some there.  For example I may tell them that I came to New York. I do have a link saying that this is my personal blog if you want to click on it. I want them to have a choice. A lot of my clients do read my personal blog, but I don't want to confuse the grandmothers. When they come to see the sneak peek of their child, I don't want them to have to read it (my personal blog).

Audience: When did you start to figure out how to blog the personal stuff after you just started the blog for your mom? 
Erin - For me, it has changed. My voice isn't the same, and it's constantly changing. I am growing as a person, so I find myself influenced by other blogs I read, but I think I've found my confidence in myself after the GAP casting call, maybe about a year later.
Amanda - I have always been a blogger. I was a blogger when I was like 14 years old. We didn’t have Facebook back then. I was your typical 14 year old who wanted to plaster photos all over the internet. I used Geocities back then. I traveled a lot back then, too. I had family and friends all over that I wanted to keep in touch with, and I found the internet. I honestly did exactly what I'm still doing now. I put photos up and write about it. I met my husband when I was 20, and I was still keeping it up. For our one year anniversary, he bought me the domain name kevinandamanda. Even then, I had readers that I didn't know - not friends and family. I think two things to remember are that you have to talk about what you want. It's not real if it's not you. You won't enjoy it. Say it how you want to say it, how you would tell a friend. Sometimes I get stuck with the writing part. The photos are the voice of my blog. I pretend like I’m calling a friend on the phone. Also, your readers will let you know what they expect from you, so it's a balance. If I post 50,000 travel photos in a row, I know they want more food.
Erin - When Ephraim turned 2, we bought EphraimCobb.com. Someday someone will google him, and he can do what he wants with it someday.

Audience: How do you manage your SEO when you have a work blog and a photography blog, assuming you put your real name on both blogs? 
Erin - I'm not an SEO expert, but I want people to come to find my business blog when they google "Huntsville children's blog." I don't care if they google my name and find my personal blog because there is a link to my photography blog.
Audience:  Do you use other social media to promote your business blog?
Amanda - Yes, I use them all. I use a Facebook fan page. I use Twitter, but I resist Pinterest. I tried to resist Instagram. I'm addicted to that. If I could only use one social media, it would be Instagram. I do like Facebook, but the voice of my blog is photos, so I like the places I can share photos. I don’t do a lot of updates, but I'll share photos or a link back to my blog with what I'm sharing that day. Twitter does not come naturally to me. If I weren't a blogger, I don’t think I'd be on Twitter. It's not my thing, but I use it because it's where I can talk to other bloggers. I have found a lot of bloggers may not answer your email or Facebook, but they're good at answering on Twitter. I will promote my posts every time I write a new one, but I use Twitter to talk to other bloggers to build a relationship and network with them.

Audience: What do you use to publish?
Amanda - I use WordPress now.

Audience:  When you take pictures of other kids or when you travel, do you worry about that?
Erin - For my business, they’ve all signed a model release. I don't always ask friends and family, but they know that's what I do, so I figure they'll tell me. I'm cautious about what I share. Six years old is too old to show in underwear.
Amanda - We have someone talking about street photography later. That would be the person to ask.

Top 10: Best Things About Being Single

So my family is back.  The RV trip is over - for this year anyway, although they're already talking about a trip to the Grand Canyon next year.  While I missed them (yes, I did), I've already realized that there are some advantages to being single.  I pointed out a couple earlier this week when I talked about what I learned from being single, but I think this topic deserves a full list, don't you?

Top Ten Best Things About Being Single


10. When I put something away, it stays put away. It was so nice to be able to find things, or to walk into my house and not have random things strewn about.  Even better, when I went to go look for something, it was still where I put it days later.

9. On the flip side, I have the freedom to leave things out.  While I loved having things where they belong, if I was having a long day or just felt like being lazy, I could toss something on the kitchen table and not have to worry about putting it away until I was ready.  And those projects I was working on?  It's always the same - you have to make it worse to make it better.  I could stop in the middle of a project and leave it out to continue later, rather than having to pile it up somewhere so it would be out of the way.  Trust me, mess like this also encourages me to be productive!

8. Multiple people make geometrically more laundry.  I did four loads of laundry after my family left town.  Once I was caught up completely, I didn't have to do another load because it was just me, and I don't make that much laundry.  Let's just say that I already have a load of laundry going, and wow it's going to be a long time before I get caught up again.

7. I get the weather only when I get the weather.  My husband is obsessed with the weather.  I remember when Hurricane Katrina struck, shortly after Little Miss was born.  The weather channel was on 24/7, and no matter what time I was awake or asleep, my husband was providing updates.  Even now, I've already been told that we are finished with the 100 degree days for now.  We are likely to have thunderstorms after noon.  The wind isn't strong enough that it should cause any damage. The humidity is at 54% right now.  You get the picture.... It sort of cracks me up, but I prefer my weather in small doses - when I want to know.

6.  Food lasts a lot longer.  When I cooked, I will admit that I forgot how to cook for one - which admittedly has its pluses and minuses.  That said, given how hot it's been, it was nice to be able to cook a meal and then eat it for leftovers for a few days.  I am one who can eat the same thing day after day with no complaints, and I did.  As much as I love to cook, it was nice to have the extra time to be more productive.

5. I can eat when and where I want.  Heat messes with my appetite.  When it's this hot, I'm just not hungry.  Or at least I'm not hungry at regular mealtimes.  When my family is around, I feel obligated to eat with them and to sit at the family table and talk to them.  While they were gone, I might eat lunch at 10:30 or I might eat it at 2pm.  And it's possible that there were a couple times I ate dinner at 11pm or midnight.  I like being able to listen to my body that way, even if my body is a little ... out of the ordinary.

4.  There's no discussion of what we're eating.  I forgot how just making breakfast is a production.  Silly me, I offer choices.  They are the same choices every day: Greek yogurt with preserves (Mister Man only), scrambled eggs (Little Miss), an omelet (Little Miss - guess who doesn't like eggs), oatmeal (both), or homemade granola (both).  They aren't a ton of options.  It's the same thing every day.  And every day, I have to go through the options, explain that no, there aren't other choices.  Discuss what sounds good that morning.  And then cook two different things.  And that's only breakfast....

3.  I can be so much more productive.  I had forgotten - or maybe I'd just never realized - how much time constraints curtail my productivity.  When I'm constantly operating under the "I only have two hours before I need to pick up the wee ones/leave for an activity/cook dinner/the bus gets home" - and more.  Having the freedom to not need to look at a watch and simply work until I was too tired to do more allowed me to get so much more done.

2.  I didn't have to fill up my gas tank.  Granted, I drove down to Naperville from my house twice (an hour drive each way).  I drove to Des Plaines one day (another hour drive).  But without the daily running here or there with the wee ones to and from activities and school and the like, it was amazing how much less gas I used.  Even once you include the errands I ran and things I did just for me, I drove many fewer miles.  I even heard my wallet say, "Thank you!"

And the best thing about being single?...

1.  Sleep.  Pure and simple, it's sleep.  There was no one snoring in my ear all night long.  No one tossing and turning on my mattress that really should have been replaced awhile ago.  No little giggles or noises of small children running up and down the stairs at 6am.  If I have trouble sleeping, it's all on me.  And not being woken up at 6am?  Now that I'm going to miss!

What are the biggest advantages to being single in your mind?

Why One Cat Is Fat. And The Other... Is Not

You know that we have cats, right? We've had Meow and Roar since Mister Man was three. He was the one who named them, actually, back when he wanted a lion instead of a cat. Meow and Roar were older kittens at the time. They were strays, maybe 10 months old, and Meow was the smaller of the two kittens.

Oh how times have changed.

Roar - the all orange one - is now the smaller cat, by a lot. The cats are brothers, so who knew they'd become such different cats as they grew. The other day, my husband called me over to show me that he'd figured out the issue.



Things I've Learned

1. Meow likes to eat.
2. Roar is sort of dainty.
3. Meow is a pig.
4. Meow needs to learn manners.
5. Meow is a rude pig.
6. Roar always expects that there will be a little more.
7. Meow has an insatiable appetite and won't let anyone or anything get in his way.
8. If you want to poison my cats, Meow will happily scarf down anything and everything. You might have to sweeten the pot for Roar.
9. Meow is a huge, rude pig.
10. There's a good reason Meow is fatter.

How To Remove Snow - When You Don't Own A Snowblower

In case anyone has missed it, there was a massive amount of snow dumped on pretty much the entire United States in the past twenty-four hours. There are all sorts of great posts by people out there having fun in the snow, but we had a slightly more practical matter at hand.

Where we live, we received in excess of 20 inches of snow. And it had drifted. A lot. We also own no snowblower. My husband called me hard core this morning, pointing out that since this snow didn't make me want to go buy a snowblower, nothing would. He's right. Except for possibly living in Buffalo where snows like this are de rigeur.

Instead, I've compiled my lessons learned over the past ahem years living in cold climates from Minnesota to Chicago to Connecticut. And yes, our driveway and sidewalks are now cleared.

Top Ten Tips For Clearing Snow

10) Choose your instrument wisely. I love my shovel. First, it has a lifetime guarantee, so I don't worry about breaking it. Second, it's the right size for me so I can get enough snow picked up with each scoop to be effective without getting so much that I can't lift it and risk a heart attack. Did I mention that it has a metal blade at the bottom for scraping all the way to the bottom? Oh, and it has sides, which means snow doesn't fall off as you're lifting, unlike the wee ones' shovels.

9) Don't wait until the snow has stopped falling to start clearing. Yeah, it's no fun to shovel multiple times, but it is so much easier to shovel three inches than it is to shovel twenty. Of course if your snow is later turning to freezing rain, forget I said that. It's easier to shovel ice encrusted snow than it is to remove straight ice from your driveway.

8) When you're shoveling, figure out which way is downwind. It was windy today when we were shoveling. The wind was blowing north to south. Our driveway runs east/west. Shoveling the south half of the driveway was breeze (pun intended?). The north half of the driveway? I kept forgetting to not throw the snow and instead carefully place it on our ever growing pile. The end result? Snow in my face and down my jacket, making me very cold.

7) Shovel early in the day. I don't say this simply because it's better not to procrastinate and yadda yadda. When you get most of the snow off your driveway and you have a blacktop driveway, the sun quickly heats up the surface and will melt the "leftover" snow, making things so much easier for you.

6) Figure out where the edges of your driveway are early on. If you don't establish your boundaries when you first start shoveling - especially if you live somewhere that produces more snow before your first snow melts - you'll slowly lose ground. Your ten foot wide driveway that is plenty big enough to get in and out of will become a nine and a half foot driveway when you just get it mostly shoveled. Then it will melt and freeze and harden and snow again. Your next shoveling gives you a nine foot wide driveway, and so forth. Not that this has ever been a problem for me. Nope, not here!

5) Try to shovel before walking or driving on your snow. It's much easier to pick up fresh snow than it is to get snow or ice that's been ground into your driveway, especially if it's concrete and not blacktop. If you have to drive, shovel your tire tracks as soon as possible so they don't freeze into a slippery mess you can never remove.

4) Enlist help in your shoveling. The wee ones have their own shovels, and they actually sort of enjoy helping out. Of course, their version of "helping" frequently means putting snow back where I just removed it, but they're learning. Slowly. My husband is fortunately a much better help. Or I'm good help for him. We help each other. It makes the shoveling go that much faster, especially when we're both determined to show the other that we're working harder and shoveling more.

3) Make sure you clear out the area in front of your mailbox that your local snowplow "accidentally" forgets to plow. We learned the hard way that Mr. Mailman will not deliver unless there is a clear path to the mailbox from ten feet before to ten feet after the mailbox itself. Because he left a nasty government note and refused to deliver our mail two years ago after the snowplow stopped plowing about two feet from the edge of the street for some unknown reason. Granted, this year I'm debating simply picking up my mail daily until April since there is 20 plus inches of snow six feet out from my mailbox because our village has apparently decided we only need one lane in our neighborhood. And I simply can't shovel that much snow.

2) Don't forget to have fun with the snow once it's cleared. This time around, we had enough snow for the wee ones to build an igloo or two. They thought it was the coolest thing ever - far cooler than the snow angels we usually do (we found out it was literally too deep to make snow angels this time around) or snowmen, which we may yet do.

And the number one way to get rid of snow when you don't own a snowblower?

Make friends with your neighbors who own snowblowers. Today, a neighbor saw us struggling to shovel. After he'd finished his (larger) driveway after having started before we did, he walked over with his two stage snowblower on steroids and asked if we wanted help. Given that the snow was deeper than the intake on even his massive snowblower, we weren't about to turn that down. He was a huge help and a major reason it took us only two hours to do the driveway and sidewalk today. I've had other neighbors come by before - generally the boys down the way who this year opened a business to do your driveway for $5 per inch (they cleaned up today!). That said, I've also had the nice village snowplow man - who was nowhere in sight today - see me pathetically shoveling on my own and do a detour to clear out the bottom section of my driveway. It's always appreciated, and yes, we thank people with a case of nice beer. Ok except the neighbor kids. We find alternate thank you gifts for them!

So how was your snow day today?

How NOT To Travel Over The Holidays

We are home and safe, and in the end, we eventually had fun. That's what I need to focus on. But I'm not quite there yet. Plus, I wouldn't want anyone else to have the joy I experienced; I'd rather people learn from my (husband's) mistakes and avoid some of our disaster.

Top Things I Learned Over Break:

1) Do not let your husband make the travel arrangements. Or at least not my husband. While I have been known to be ummm frugal, there are limits to it. And why did we do this? It wouldn't have anything to do with my husband forgetting to make flight reservations, nope not that! We ended up flying out of Milwaukee instead of Chicago because it was cheaper. While Milwaukee isn't that much more of a drive, it leads to the next point.

2) Do not travel on connecting flights. The more connecting flights you have, the more potential for problems, especially in winter. And over the holidays. Ditto ten times over for connections where the second airline isn't the same as the first - which ours wasn't... to start.

3) Do not take the last flight of the evening. Aside from the obvious issues of tired and cranky children (and possibly parents), if there are any issues with your flight - like ohhhh say United being unable to find a gate for a flight for almost 50 minutes - and your connection takes off while you are still waiting for a gate, there are no options to get to your destination that day.

4) When rebooking your flight with the customer service agents, check the weather for destinations you weren't originally intending to go but are now being told you will go. Our direct flight from Chicago to Orlando turned into a connection in DC and a switch over from United to Delta. Had I not been so exhausted, I would have checked the weather in DC and discovered that Delta had already canceled all their flights for the current day because of weather that was supposed to get worse the day we were flying and refused to go there.

5) Don't simply show up at the airport the next day to see if there are any standby flights available, call the airline to check that night once you get to your airline paid for hotel room. We showed up at 5:15am for our 7:05 flight to DC. We went through security and asked Customer Service to check flights for us again. It turns out that there was a United Flight at 6am to Cleveland (where there was NOT weather) that would have gotten us to Orlando by 11:30am that had plenty of open seats. The customer service agent the night before had somehow overlooked that flight. Except it was now 5:45 and the doors were closing. There was no physical way for us to get to the gate in time to make the flight. To say I was unhappy was putting it mildly.

6) If upon arriving at your temporary destination, your new carrier has canceled all flights, don't wait in the super long line there. Instead, go talk to the folks at your original carrier. Delta's flight to Orlando was canceled by the time we arrived in DC. And that wasn't their only canceled flight. The line was hours long. I scooted over to United where there were two people ahead of me and had a nice chat with the agent there. The bad news? Although it was Sunday at 10am, there was no flight available on any carrier to get us to Orlando until Tuesday. Tuesday. It didn't matter if we were willing to go to San Francisco to fly to Orlando, there was nothing available. Zip. The galling part? Although we had asked for a direct flight (as we'd originally had) from Chicago to Orlando when being rebooked initially and United had sent us to DC instead - where flights had already been canceled and there was more weather scheduled - because this was now a weather related delay, we were on our own for finding and paying for a hotel for the next two nights. Ahhhh, no. That's not ok.

7) If your flight is being rebooked due to a missed connections, do your best to get your checked luggage back. We had our carry on luggage only, as our checked baggage was sent from Chicago to Orlando on the direct flight at 6:48 Sunday morning - a flight where there was room for our bags but sadly not us. And in DC, there was no hope to get our bags back. Although we'd be stuck in DC for an additional two days, United could not - or rather would not - get our bags to DC so that we could have a change of clothes or any of our belongings. And again... since it's a weather related delay now, there was no compensation for lost bags, meals, hotel, or anything. This was a big problem because of the next issue.

8) Make sure you always pack what you need in your carry on. I've followed this rule for years. I always have a change of clothes and other necessities in my carry on. Increasing restrictions over the years have made this more of a challenge, but I always focus on it. My husband learned this lesson the hard way. He didn't have necessities packed. And for some unknown reason, he took Little Miss's pull ups out of her carry on and put them into checked bags. Three days with no pull ups for her. Night one she somehow managed to stay dry. Night two, not so much. And United simply told us to head to the nearest store. In a strange city. Where we had no car. On our way to a hotel we were paying for on our own. Or not.

9) When desperate enough, rent a car to drive where you're going - but call to make a reservation first. I'd done that before when working in consulting in Detroit. Detroit more than once canceled the flights back to Chicago that we were on. Rather than be stuck in Detroit for another night, twice I rented a car and drove back to Chicago - once running into some co-workers in the rental car office who were trying to do the same thing only to discover that there were no cars available. I had called the rental car office as soon as I realized the situation and - as it turns out - had gotten the very last car once. I called again this time and was initially told all cars were gone before they finally found one for me. While it's more expensive to rent in one location and return in another, it isn't always - and this was one of those situations where it was worth it. We'll ignore the very nearly wiping out the car on a patch of ice in North Carolina while trying to slow down for a wreck ahead (thank you years of driving in Minnesota!) and the sixteen hours it took us to drive in favor of arriving in Orlando almost a full day before United was going to be able to get us there.

10) If you change your itinerary due to unforeseen circumstances, make sure you inform the airline. This is where being a consultant came in handy again. Because we chose not to fly the last leg of our flight down, I contacted United to let them know that we were not canceling the remainder of our itinerary and absolutely were planning to still fly home on Saturday. Had I not done so before the scheduled flight on Tuesday morning, our entire reservation would have been canceled, and we would have had to buy last minute tickets to fly home - not how I would want to end my vacation. Fortunately, this was not an issue.

And lastly...

11) Keep everyone informed of your status. We had a car rental reservation in Orlando that expected us to show up Saturday evening. Ditto with a hotel reservation. As I learned that we'd be delayed, I called both the car company and hotel to let them know that we were still planning to use the reservation but had been unavoidably delayed and to not release our reservation. While the rental car wouldn't be so big a deal - finding a car wouldn't be the biggest deal, although I'd lose out on the coupons I'd found and used - arriving at our hotel only to find that there was no room at the inn for us would have been the disaster that put me over the edge.

As I was, I felt rather like we were in National Lampoon's Vacation - less the grandmother tied to the roof or, thankfully, Wally World being closed once we arrived, but this is not a trip I'd wish on anyone. We lost days off our not quite seven day vacation and added some significant and unexpected expenses to it, not to mention we were all absolutely exhausted after multiple nights of very little sleep. All because United couldn't clear a gate at O'Hare for us and then did a poor job rebooking us; yeah, they'll be hearing from me.

On the plus side, we had a blast while we were there, albeit a much shorter blast with fewer days at Disney because we needed to rest. We didn't let our "adventure" getting to our vacation ruin it for us - although poor Mister Man (that whole Asperger's thing rearing its ugly head) very nearly did. I'll share my creative and surprisingly effective solution to that in another post.

But this? This was the last time we're traveling over the holidays. And here's hoping you can use some of what I learned to prevent misery when you travel.

Oh Yeah - Til Death Do Us Part

Last night, I had a brainstorm after my husband and I had a ... discussion of him not eating his pizza crusts and therefore wasting food (he doesn't just not eat the bready tip parts but leaves behind some of the sauce and cheese that are at the end of the pizza slice) - not choosing to simply take a middle piece befuddles me. Granted, it's a silly thing, but isn't that the point of marriage? Having fun and enjoying the little silly things?

Forget the cherishing, the keeping in sickness and in health. There are more important things we forgot. Without Further Ado (or is that without further "I do" - ha!), I present to you my top ten list of items I neglected to include in my (husband's) wedding vows:

10) I will eat all that my wife puts in front of me, whether it's my favorite food or whether it is something that I need to tolerate.

9) I will always empty the trash when it begins to near the top of the trash can without reminders from others in the household.

8) When I pick something up, I will replace it where I found it.

Corollary: I will remember where that place is the next time I want to use it.

7) When it is bedtime for the children, I will not start unrelated projects that distract them from going to bed and me from helping them to get ready for bed.

6) When there is icky, nasty food that's been left in the fridge for far too long, I will uncomplainingly remove it from its container out of my wife's sight and smell, dispose of it, and clean said container.

5) I will offer nightly foot massages.

4) I will not start up my car and run it for ten minutes before leaving the house in the morning once Jack Frost begins visiting. Instead of wasting gas and money, I will not be lazy and instead will scrape the frost from my car.

3) When sent to the grocery store with a list, I will purchase the items requested.

Corollary: I will not come home with random other items that are not needed or wanted in the household.

2) I will let me wife get the mail from the mailbox, knowing that it brings her an unexpected sense of pleasure to be the one to get and sort through the mail.

and the number one thing I forgot to add to my (husband's) wedding vows?

1) I shall learn to chew with my mouth closed and without smacking my lips.

So what kinds of things did you neglect to include in your wedding vows that you wish you could renegotiate?



Current Giveaways:
Family pass to the Chicago Toy and Game Fair in Chicago November 20 or 21 here
Activeion ionator HOM $180RV here
Fiber One Prize Pack including a $25 gift card here

Focusing On What I *DID* Do

Current Giveaways:

Strawberry Shortcake DVDs here
9Lives Prize Pack here
$25 Target Gift Card and a whole bunch of back to school type stuff here
Seventh Generation prize pack filled with cleaning supplies here - ENDS TONIGHT

***

When people put a to do list together or make a goal, we tend to focus on what we didn't do, on those areas where we failed. I put together a wish list of thirty items that I wanted to get done this summer. Knowing that I had the wee ones home with me all day and was going to be out of town for most of August, it was a long list. And - like everyone else - I've since added to it.

Well, my time is up - and probably a little past up since Little Miss went back to school last week. It's time for a review of how I did. But you know what? I don't want to focus on what I didn't do. I can and will still do those items. Instead, I'm going to buck the trend and celebrate the things that I did do! I challenge you to do the same.

30. Get my pile of magazines to read down from their current seven plus inch pile. If that means throwing some out, I'll find the fortitude.
Done! I tossed out a few magazines that I will never read, but the rest of them? I spent a good portion of the summer getting caught up on the ones I care about, and that pile is no longer in existence. I have three magazines that have come in the past two weeks to read, but that's it. I DID it.

28. Get an "exclusive" invite to just one party at BlogHer for a brand I'm passionate about (what, you don't think I'm cool enough? Thanks a lot!)
So done. BlogHer was an absolute blast, and I can't wait for 2011 in San Diego. I had some really cool party invites that came through, and I had so much fun and learned so much, too. And ummm yes, I still have to write about many of those. It's on the new to do list.

27. Sign myself up for the summer reading club at the library - and read the minimum 12 books.
I signed myself up. And I read far more than the twelve books. I neglected to log all the books I read, but that list isn't for me anyway - it's to show what I did. And like I tell the wee ones - what matters is that you know what you did, not that others see it.

26. Update all the binders for the nine (yes, NINE) jobs I had on the PTO this year.
Not only done, but those were handed off (happily, I might add) on June 21. Oh was that a good feeling!

25. Pass off said binders to the new PTO members who will be henceforth responsible.
Ahem. As mentioned - done!

24. Head out to Old West Town and do some gold panning with the wee ones (and friends).
We had this scheduled twice, but unfortunately weather interfered once and the second time I had a commitment come up last minute. We still got together both times with the wee ones' friends and did something unique and fun, but next year we'll have to go. I count this as done though as the spirit of it was there.

20. Fix the basement from our ejector pump fail last weekend - new carpet, drywall, bifold doors, and all.
Thank goodness this is done, no thanks to the bad carpet measurer from Costco. Trust me, you don't want the long, sordid story. But I have a beautiful, inhabitable basement once again!

19. Move the playroom toys into the newly fixed basement - and sort out those that are no longer played with first.
Done! And yes, the toys are even sorted. I probably need to go through them again with a fine toothed comb, but I've taken out so many that we just don't play with anymore. And boy, does that feel good!

18. Purchase desks and whiteboard paint to create a homework room in the former playroom.
Well, technically, I've purchased this. I suppose I did a good job in wording this goal. The homework room is mostly set up. The only thing I have left to do is paint the magnetic whiteboard(s), and I can't wait to share the difference with you!

13. Sign Little Miss up for gymnastics (which technically starts on Monday, I believe. Oops).
She was signed up. She even attended all the sessions we signed her up for, and she's gotten so much better over the summer now that she's in a "real" class. And yes, she's signed up for the fall session, too. Whoo hoo!

12. Complete the C25K training (Week 4 Day 3 tomorrow!) - even if it's after the 5K that I'm signed up for at BlogHer.
Oh I so did this. I am so stoked that I ran my first 5K! Of course I then didn't run for the rest of August, but I'm back in the saddle per se this week and am working my way back up - a 20 minute run is in my future tomorrow.

11. Create a more regular bedtime that results in a less tired me.
I think I did this. I am upstairs no later than 11pm every night, and frequently I go to bed earlier. One night last week I even went to bed at 8pm. It's definitely helping.

10. Find time to use the massage gift card my husband gave me for Mother's Day.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... do I need to say more?

6. Buy a new laptop to replace the one I have to turn in for work - and be happy with my choice. (ummm, again - suggestions?)
I'm typing on it as we speak. It took me forever to decide on one, but I like it. Except for the random size changing and web page going backwards that happens. But it so works for me, and I really missed having a laptop in that two week period I was without.

2. Set realistic deadlines for projects - and ensure I make each of them.
I'm getting there. I've gone back to making lists, which really helps me prioritize what I need to get done in a day and what I can get done. I love lists. Have I mentioned that before?

1. Enjoy my time with the wee ones - and ensuring they're enjoying their summer, as well!
Oh that was so done! From the picnics to the classes to bike riding to Florida to the pool to Uno and more, we had a blast. Yayyyyy!

And now to go work on those items I haven't yet accomplished. Sixteen semi-major projects done over the summer? I call that a success. We won't talk about the other fourteen. Shhhh!

Bear With Me - I Used To Love To Fly

I spent the last five days in New York at BlogHer, and I'm still exhausted - which really means that I'm slightly crabby, so it's possible that might come through in this post. And when I admit to being slightly crabby, well... let your imagination go from there. Apparently sleep and I are better friends than I thought, and I miss my buddy!

I used to have a job where I flew weekly. I was always on the road traveling, and it was actually sort of fun. A (reimbursed) car would drop me off and pick me up, and I had status on an airline so I could use the "special people line" - as some of my friends called it - and get through security extremely quickly. I mastered the art of showing up at the gate as the plane was beginning to board and just breezing on.

It wasn't a bad life. But times have changed, and I fly only a few times a year now - not that I'm complaining. I have flown enough though that I have a few pet peeves about other travelers. On my way to and from New York, I witnessed many of them, and I just have to share them to regain some of my zen.

My Top Ten Pet Peeves About Flying

10) Smelly food With the cuts in airline service and the need to arrive at the airport so early now, I completely understand the need to eat during travels. My issue comes when you bring your greasy, smelly food into the airplane where the recirculated air causes everyone to smell it for way too long. If you are going to eat food that has a strong smell, do it before you get on the plane. If you need to eat while flying, bring something that won't bother everyone around you. Plenty of outlets sell sandwiches or salads or bagels that have no scent. Or be like me and bring your own food from home - cheaper and no worries about smelling up the cabin.

9) Loud music Small quarters, remember? I don't need to know that you're listening to the latest OutKast single or that you're really into Peter, Paul, and Mary. When you have an iPod or DVD turned up loud enough that I can understand the lyrics, it's too loud. Be respectful of the shared space, and keep it at a reasonable volume. I promise I'll do the same with my Indigo Girls and INXS and Pat McCurdy.

8) Putting up the armrest This one sort of creeps me out, actually. We're strangers sharing a small space. I'm taking advantage of any and all barriers between us to avoid becoming too close. The armrest between seats is there for just that reason. When you sit down and attempt to raise the armrest? Ewww. And no, I'm not going to let it happen.

7) Not knowing how to get through security I know there are lots of rules. Nothing more than 3(.4) ounces, all liquids have to be in your quart bag and removed from your suitcase. Shoes have to come off. Laptops need to be screened separately. You can't wear any jackets or other outer clothing. While this is a lot to remember if you don't do it regularly, the fact that the TSA employees are repeating this constantly should make it not too difficult a process. But the people who try to walk through without taking off their shoes? Or the ones who have to go back and unpack their bags to remove the illegal items after they've gone through security and hold up the lines? Or figure out only as it's their turn to go through security that no, you can't push the baby in the stroller through the scanner? Hold me.

6) Personal grooming is not for public places Yes, this actually happens. On my flight to New York, I could hear someone clipping nails ... of some sort. Even if, by some miracle, you have a receptacle to put them in, I don't want to see or hear you clipping your nails on the plane (or at work - but that's a different complaint). It's gross. And wrong. And please wait until you're in a private place like ohhhhh maybe your bathroom.

5) Not knowing where your seat is (sitting in C instead of A) Planes have these nifty things above each seat that show which seat is where. It's also really easy to figure out that A starts on the right side of the plane as you're walking down the aisle and goes from there. If you have 8A, don't try to sit in the aisle seat. If you have 16E, really don't try to sit in the aisle. And if you truly can't figure it out and someone comes to sit in the seat you're in, don't get all huffy when someone wants to sit in their legitimate seat.

4) Crowding around the gate Airlines are trying to get planes loaded as quickly as possible to get out on time. If they don't get the doors closed in time, they lose their spot in line, and the flight is delayed while they try to get reshuffled in the takeoff order - just like when you're 20 minutes late to your doctor's appointment! That being said, they know how to be efficient, thus the boarding groupings. If you are in group 5 and the plane is boarding only the premier people, there is no need to block the gate area and crowd around everything. They aren't going to give away your seat, and you aren't going to miss the plane. Let the people board who are currently being called. And if you're in Group 5, don't try to board with Group 2. You'll still get on the plane and arrive in one piece. Just be patient - the plane will board faster if you let people actually get on the plane.

3) Shoes off on the walls A plane is a public place (ummm, did I mention this already?), and lots of people are right there. Leave your shoes on. Trust me, your feet stink. And not only that, I don't want to see them, especially not if you're putting them up on the wall of the plane. That's gross. And just flat out wrong. It makes me gag just thinking about it. Please leave your shoes on. And if you really have to take them off, hide your feet under your seat so I don't know it's your feet that I'm smelling.

2) Pushing to get off the plane Much like the grand rush to get on the plane, I sometimes see a huge rush to get off. If you're in the back of the plane, you need to wait your turn. The flight attendants can only open the doors so fast, and everyone in the rows ahead of you should be getting off the plane first. The only exception to this is if there is a tight connection and the attendants have asked that you let those people connecting get off first. In that case, let those people out and just sit tight for an extra minute or two. It'll all be good, I promise. But pushing ahead to get off the plane first just because you want to get off the plane? Not cool.

1) Using the back of the seat to get up I totally get that the legroom on planes is small and makes it somewhat difficult to maneuver in the planes. On the other hand, those seats that recline oh-so-nicely are pretty sensitive to people touching them. When you stand up, don't use my seat back to hoist you up or help you move across the row. When you're walking in the plane, don't hold onto every seat as you go by. When you do that, it shakes the seat and is rather uncomfortable for the person sitting in it. And if you accidentally do? Have the courtesy to apologize to the person you just shook. A much better solution? Use those armrests that you didn't put up to support you as you stand and make your way.

Oh I feel so much better now. Thanks for listening. What are your traveling pet peeves?

Packing For BlogHer: I've Got A Strategy

I have a trio of fun giveaways going on right now:

Family calendar giveaway from BusyBodyBook right here.

JumpStart Get Moving Family Fitness game for the Wii right here.

Spinbrush MyWay! (for girls) battery operated toothbrush right here.

***

So in - let's see - less than nine hours, I will be in the air on my way to New York City for Blogher '10. There's a reason that I'm not yet asleep, but I'm actually not quite sure what that is. Maybe it's just practice for my sleep deprivation while at BlogHer.

The good news is that I'm pretty much packed. And I say pretty much because not everything is in my suitcase. But I am a champion packer, so I know I can finish it lightning quick. I have a strategy for packing.

There are certain things I've learned that make packing and getting to the airport much easier for me. And since I'm such a nice person, I'm going to share them with you!

My Top Ten Packing Strategies

1) That one-quart bag that you're allowed to bring in your carry on with your up to 3.4 ounce liquid items? Put it in the outer pocket of your carry on or in your purse. No digging, no delays, just a quick zip and you've got it out and ready.

2) It's possible that I sometimes cheat with my carry ons. I will put my purse into a carry on as I'm going through security if I need to - when I take out my laptop, I can sneak my purse in and voila, an extra carry on, if needed. I will say that I still put only one item in the overhead compartment; the rest goes under the seat in front of me. I'm not a carry on storage hog!

3) To avoid digging through everything to get my license to go through security, when I arrive at the airport, my license goes into my front pocket so that I've got it handy - especially if my purse is inside another carry on! Once I'm through security, the purse comes out and my license goes right back in its place.

4) I always wear easy slip on shoes when going through security, too. When it's summer, those slip on shoes are frequently ones where I'm not wearing socks. There is no way that I'm going to walk barefoot on the airport floor though. Call me a wimp, but the thought just skeeves me out. Instead, I carry a pair of socks in my purse (or outside pocket of my carry on) strategically placed so that I can easily grab the socks and put them on while I'm without my shoes.

5) I carry a reusable water bottle with me almost everywhere I go. Headed to NYC for five days? It's definitely joining me. I'm not going to waste the space that my forty ounce bottle takes inside a carry on, though. I use a carabiner to attach the bottle to the outside of a carry on, and it's easily passed through. Bonus? Once I'm through security, I can fill up my water bottle giving me plenty to drink on the plane without having to wait for service aboard the plane.

6) I always pack a few little snacks. They are always ones that can't be crushed (no potato chips!) and are shelf stable (duh?), as well as being ones that don't smell. There's nothing worse - ok, there is, but this is still a pet peeve of mine - than getting on a small plane with recirculated air and having to smell other people's food. Granola bars are perfect for this, and I've got a few packed in my purse already.

7) All my electronic chargers are in one place. I usually put them in the outside pocket of my carry on, and they are somehow magically the right size. It makes them easy to access when I'm in the airport and need to charge something while I'm waiting around. Plus, it makes it super easy to unpack and find everything once you've arrived at your destination. Everything in its place and all.

8) I carry a couple extra packs of gum with me when I'm traveling, too. When you're in the dry air of an airplane for an extended period, you start to feel dehydrated. If you don't have a water bottle or other beverage available, gum is a great way to keep your mouth from drying out.

9) I know I'm not alone in this one, but I dress to avoid having to pack extra items. I tend to wear simmilar colors, which means I need fewer purses, jewelry, and shoes. I will actually change out outfits to ensure that I'm not causing myself to carry more luggage. Fortunately, there are some color palettes that I tend to like.

10) Did I mention that I always check in online? You can check in up to twenty-four hours before your flight, including checking luggage now (cheaper than doing it at the airport!). If I don't have a seat assignment or I don't like my seat, checking in early gives me a better shot at grabbing one of the seats that has been released. But if I still don't have a seat (and I don't for Sunday's flight back), there's no panic. I still have a ticket, and they'll find a seat for me unless I choose to give it up for compensation from the airline. If I don't like my seat, I can always request a seat change at the gate. I don't always get it, but it never hurts to ask!

So with that, I'm off to go finish my packing. BlogHer in T minus not enough hours!

I'm Not An Alcoholic

I have a trio of fun giveaways going on right now:

Family calendar giveaway from BusyBodyBook right here.

JumpStart Get Moving Family Fitness game for the Wii right here.

Spinbrush MyWay! (for girls) battery operated toothbrush right here.

***

I may have just drunk a good portion of a bottle of wine by myself, but I am not an alcoholic. Let me explain how I got to this situation in the first place.

1) I am on day three of being a single parent, and I forget how hard it is when you don't have any support at home. Sure, it's nice that when I put things a certain way they stay that way, but when I need a break, I no longer have one. No, my husband didn't leave me - he's in Vegas with a friend for five days. Yes, I'm that nice a wife.

2) I agreed to watch a friend's two children for five hours a day three Sundays in a row. While her kids are fine and mine like them, having four kids in the house while trying to avoid crying and other drama can be somewhat traumatic. Today was our third week of the three...

3) ... so I decided to take all four children by myself (see #1) to the Kohl's Children's Museum today. On their 25th anniversary celebration. A free day. To say it was crowded was a bit of an understatement. I will admit that the day went far better than I thought it would as I started out, but my grasp on sanity has obviously left me - proof being the idea in the first place.

4) I have certain rules in my car - like no throwing of any objects by anyone - that I tend to be fairly strict about. I pulled my car to the side of the road to reiterate that one on the way home after four overtired children couldn't quite manage to listen to reason while the car was moving. Once I mentioned that things like throwing items in my car (and punching each other) were the kinds of behaviors that I would need to tell my friend when she asked how her children behaved and explained to my wee one that they would be cleaning out the car entirely and all books were being removed from it once we got home, all was fine.

5) Once I got home, I was proactive and did a load of laundry. After glancing inside, I saw that Little Miss's pj bottoms from the night before were in there, so I decided to do darks. (Quick backstory - with our overnight p0tty training issues and my husband out of town, I decided to put Little Miss in Pull-Ups outside her pjs. She'd still have to stay dry, but hopefully the sheets wouldn't need to be washed twice a night. Friday night she was dry all night. Last night, not so much.) What with it being summer and my husband being out of town, we had slightly fewer darks than normal, so I took a look through my closet to see if I could toss anything extra in. Bad idea mixing Mommy's nice clothes with the wee ones' wear.

6) Once the wee ones were in bed, the washer finished at exactly the right time. As I started pulling clothes out, I noticed that there were little white things in my load of darks. Ugh, I thought, Little Miss put one of her dirty Kleenexes in her pocket and forgot to take it off. (She'd had a little runny nose for a couple days.) As I continued to pull items from the washer, I realized that no... this was in fact a Pull-Up explosion. Although I'd asked her this morning when I saw her in different bottoms what she'd done with the bottoms and Pull-Up (and ensured that she put the bottoms in the washer instead of her dirty hamper), she had "accidentally" put the Pull-Up in the washer, and I hadn't seen it when I'd peeked inside.

7) I took the entire load downstairs and outside and proceeded to spend the next thirty-five minutes shaking out each individual piece of clothing to get as much of the nasty Pull-Up goop off the clothes as possible. Interestingly, stretchy fake type materials, silky things, and velveteen don't hold onto the goobers nearly as well as regular cotton items.

8) After that thirty-five minute period, I looked like a snowman with bad dandruff. Although I had remembered to close my mouth and nose and turn my head while shaking, I was covered in the Pull-Up goobers. On the plus side, having gone through an hour long wash cycle, at least they weren't quite so urine-soaked as they had been previously. And yes, I've since taken a shower.

9) I then spent the next twenty minutes cleaning the Pull-Up goop from the washing machine itself. You'd think a Pull-Up explosion would essentially disintegrate, but no, it adheres to any and all surfaces of the washing machine, in addition to the clothing. It was not easy to get the stuck on goop off the metal in the washing machine. Every time I thought I had it all, I found more. In the end, I practically needed to crawl inside my slightly urine-smelling washing machine (whee!) to get it all removed.

10) After putting the shaken clothes back into the washing machine for a double rinse cycle (in hot water with vinegar), I still found some of the little white goobers attached to the clothes - not nearly as many, but some. Oddly enough, I almost didn't care after having drunk my little bit of wine.

On the plus side, the wee ones were so exhausted from the activities of the day that they fell straight asleep once they tumbled into bed.

T-Ball Coaching: Lessons From The Trenches

Are you a fan of sweet? Like kettle corn perhaps? Go enter here!

***

Today was the last day of the t-ball season for the wee ones. This was the first time (and probably the only) time that they played on the same team. One set of games, no conflicts - oh it was lovely.

And did I mention that I coached? Yeah, there's goes that I-can't-say-no bug again. A lot of the reason I coached though was because we had such a poor coach last year. Nothing against him personally, but he had no experience, nor did he have the personality nor interest in t-ball to make it an experience where the kids got something out of it. After complaining, I sort of felt like I had to justify my complaints by getting involved.

And it has been a fun season - the kids all progressed, though obviously some at a much fast rate than others. I won't be sad to see it end completely - the hot and humid days in Chicago are upon us - but I learned a lot from the experience.

Which of course means that I need to share with you, too.

Behold, the Top Ten Things I Learned As A T-Ball Coach:

10) A snack is not optional.
We started out the year with the idea that it's a 45 minute to an hour long game. With maybe twenty minutes of practice beforehand. The kids don't need another junk food snack in their day. The other coach and I were good with that. By the second week, enough complaints were heard that we reluctantly instituted snacks.

9) The biggest challenge is ensuring there are no fistfights on the field.
Fortunately, this wasn't something that involved the adults. Instead, it was like the pee wee hockey or soccer games you see with a swarm of children following wherever the ball goes. Knowing my wee ones, I instituted a system for them that quickly spread to the whole team and seemed to work well.

As we got out onto the field, I drew a large circle with my heel approximating where each child was to stand. It was the circle "where they lived" while on the field, and they adored it. As we went out, they started to ask me to draw their circles. And some added to them, making them more square than circle or drawing an initial inside.

Once the kids were properly positioned, they were admonished that they were only allowed to leave their home and enter the burning lava where the ball was if if called their names. Thus "Peter's ball" was actually respected. Most of the time. Go fig.

8) Figuring out how to teach five and six year olds the "ready position" is pretty hopeless.
The other coach started out the season by calling that position "down and dirty." While good in concept - your glove is down where it can get dirty - it unfortunately was too open to interpretation.

Some kids sat down and got dirty. Some kids placed dirt in their gloves and tossed it. Some kids squatted all the way down. Some kids hunched their backs, resulting in eyes focused on the dirt and not the play - something that freaks me out, having seen more than one player injured in the past by not paying attention.

Over the course of the season, we tried one gambit after the other, but I'm pretty sure the video evidence will show that we never once managed to have all the kids in the ready position prior to a play at the same time. We were lucky if they all had their gloves on their hands.

7) Just about any child can hit a coach-pitch ball... once.
Midway through the season, our league switches from true t-ball to a coach pitch game, whereby each player get "four" pitches from the coach to hit the ball before resorting to the tee. By moving kids around, adjusting bat positions, etc., we achieved most kids hitting from the pitched ball within a couple weeks - with exceptions here and there throughout the games. Sometimes it isn't the kid that needs to adapt; it's the coaches.

6) Although the coach meeting prior to the season and the rules of the game state that kids are to given only four coach pitched balls before moving back to the tee, this didn't often happen in reality.
Our team was one of the very few that would bring out the tee after the fourth missed ball to ensure the game moved along and that no child was embarrassed after five minutes of swinging and missing. Really, after Suzy has missed the ball by a mile four times in a row, another four balls isn't magically going to turn her into Sammy Sosa.

5) Getting hit in the face with a ball isn't conducive to improving your skills.
Poor Mister Man. At a game I couldn't attend because I was on my way from work (don't ask), another father was helping to warm up the kids before the game by playing catch. He unfortunately threw a ball when Mister Man wasn't looking, and it hit him in the face. I did make it to the game in time to see him foul off a ball into his face (though luckily, I talked him into continuing to bat, and he got a hit the next pitch - phew!). Ever since that point, he's been afriaid of the ball and looks away when it comes close enough to catch. We're still working on breaking him of that habit, but unfortunately, his skills both in the field and at the plate have taken a nosedive since then.

Note to self: Always make sure a kid is looking and acknowledges you before throwing a ball. I can't handle the pressure of ruining another kid's game!

4) Don't serve snacks until after the post-game meeting.
After each game, we would always gather up to talk about who did what things really well during the game. Each kid loved puffing up with pride as we talked about great throws or hustle or hitting, etc. But once a parent opened up the snack bin immediately following the game? Yeah, we lost them. They're working on their sugar highs and anything we may have to say to them takes a backseat. We haven't had a good meeting since.

3) The game ball is a great motivator.
Another purpose of the post game meeting is to hand out the game ball, which kids treasure far more than I imagined they would (our coach last year didn't hand out game balls, so I can only assume that he kept the extra twenty-four balls he was provided - ahem). Every week, kids would ask if they were getting the game ball and what they needed to do to earn it. While we were sure that each kid got the game ball an equal number of times, we weren't shy in reminding them that things like not saying mean things to players on the other team (in the instances where they needed to use the tee) or ensuring they kept their gloves on their hands and the like were prerequisites for earning a game ball.

Now that I think about it, maybe we should have made down and dirty a motivator. Oops, too late.

2) Grandparents are an integral part of the t-ball experience.
Inevitably, one of the wee ones comes to me while at a game. Moooommmmmmy, I have to go potty! So what do I do? I simply point the offending wee one (who did go before we left the house, btw) at the nearest grandparent and send them to the gross, nasty Port-a-Potty. Ahhhh, crisis averted.

And the number one thing I learned while coaching t-ball?

1) Don't assume kids know any of the rules of baseball.
At the beginning of the year, some of our practices consisted of running the bases and teaching the kids where each base was and where to run. It was, sadly, a necessary lesson - for my wee ones, too. (Hey dads, go watch more baseball with your little kids!) Throughout the season, we rotated where kids played in the field with each inning. We would tell Joey to go to second base and lead him to it. We would tell Ricky that he was playing pitcher and lead him to it.

At today's last game? Mikey, you're playing third base. Ummm Coach, where's third base? Oh vey.

So what have you learned from your sports experiences?