My Family Left Me....

I am completely alone right now.  Given that it's a Monday morning, this isn't that unusual, but I was alone last night, too.  And all day yesterday.  In fact, I'll be alone for another nine days.  My family went on vacation without me.  Seriously.

It didn't start out that way.  This wasn't supposed to be the plan.  Earlier this year, Mister Man did an inquiry unit on US landmarks where he focused on Mount Rushmore.  He loved learning all about it and asked my husband if they could go there someday.  My husband thought this was a brilliant idea.

And so the germ of an idea formed.  They announced they wanted to drive to Mount Rushmore this summer, and I told them to have fun.  I'm not a fan of road trips for a number of reasons, and I get really twitchy when I'm in a car for more than four or five hours.  The plan was for Mister Man and my husband to head there for two or three days in July while Little Miss and I hung out at home and had fun.

Then I went out of town to Blissdom.

When I came back, the idea had changed.  It had grown.  It was now a monstrosity, and I hadn't been consulted.  My husband had talked to my dad about how Mister Man wanted to go see Mount Rushmore.  Between the two of them they cooked up the idea of renting an RV and going to see Mount Rushmore.  And Yellowstone.  And then they decided to add Devil's Tower to the now ten day road trip.  My parents were now going, as were both the wee ones.

I can't do an RV trip.  I just can't.  Yes, I can get up and move a little, but the idea of being in an RV for over ten days with five other people gives me the heebie jeebies.  I went on an RV trip when I was fourteen with my family, including some extended family, for three weeks through the west.  I swore I'd never set foot inside an RV again after that.  I was claustrophobic in it after awhile, and we didn't sleep in the RV.  My knees don't like it when I sit still very long, and being just a liiiiiitle bit older now, this is more of an issue.  Oh, and I need my alone time.  I can't be around that many people without a break for that long with no space to retreat and be alone at some point.

Apparently my husband and parents thought I was joking when I'd said I wasn't ever doing another RV trip.  Driving across the country is just not a vacation to me, and I will admit that this is selfish. I was not thrilled that all this had been decided upon and presented to the wee ones as a done deal without anyone consulting me, but how do I tell them that I'm going to take this away from them?

And so they're on their way right now.  They were excited when the RV pulled out at 6am yesterday.  A smaller one than we had previously.  And they're staying in campgrounds - all five of them sleeping in the RV.  And showering and cooking and eating and living... for ten days.  They plotted out the driving, and in those ten days, they'll be driving for well over 40 hours.  Each day they drive, they'll be driving for between six and eight hours, sometimes more.

I don't know how long that excitement will last.  Neither of the wee ones sleeps well with noise.  Or light.  And they aren't exactly quiet.  I'll be interested to see how the trip turns out.  Before they left, Mister Man was already planning next year's RV trip to the Grand Canyon and other destinations, but I've put the kibosh on that for the moment.

Am I selfish?  Probably.  At the same time, I know it's better for all of us that I let them go and have their vacation and that I stay home where I can catch up on work and sleep and not be crabby.  When they come back, if their visions of a trip where Little Miss spends time fishing and catching more fish than Daddy are shattered by the reality, I will feel badly for them.  I don't think this vacation will turn out quite the way they expect, but I hope they're all happy with it.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some work to catch up on.  They won't recognize this house when they get back.  Ignore that disco ball hanging in the foyer....

What's the most selfish thing you've done as a parent?

Be On Your Best Behavior

Because by the time you read this... I'll be in Las Vegas.

Oh, did I forget to mention this little vacation? My bad. Really, no need to be jealous.

My husband and I flew out bright and early, sans kids, to exceedingly hot Las Vegas for a few days. Oh, and a friend of mine from college is flying out to meet us there, too. And we're staying that the Wynn (I do a great job of finding cheap rates in Vegas, if I do say so myself).

And yep, we're going to go see Zumanity, a Cirque du Soleil resident show there. I've seen O and Mystere before, but not any of the three newer ones (Ka, Zumanity and Love). I actually much preferred Mystere to O, which I know puts me in the minority. I've heard some interesting things about Zumanity, but with a 35% discount I found, how can I not go?

The rest of the time we're there, we'll do the typical Vegas things. My husband wants to enter a poker tournament (or two) at Caesar's Palace, and I know Paul and my husband will spend plenty of time (and money) at the craps tables. And my husband will try to earn it all back at the roulette wheel, which he generally does.

Me, I'll just be watching most of the time. I'm one of those people who doesn't like to give her money away, and I'm just as happy watching the people. And cheering on my friends.

Really, the trip was fairly last minute. We were originally supposed to meet my friend in Vegas in July because he was supposed to get married in Seattle in mid-July but the wedding was called off. Good news, the wedding is back on (so I'll be in Seattle for several days in November now).

However, neither of us got our act together, so the July meet-up didn't happen. But about two weeks ago we decided to still meet up. And I decided I needed more time off work. That and maybe if I'm totally not stressed and really miss my kids, I'll enjoy the next vacation more. Because ...

We get back late Wednesday night, and Thursday morning, we head out on the aforementioned trip to Minnesota to go to the State Fair and visit some friends who live there. Unfortunately, my aunt and uncle who live there will be in Iowa that weekend, so we'll miss them (and no, they didn't offer their house for us to stay!). I'm definitely looking forward to it, as we haven't been to Minnesota since Little Miss was an infant.

Updates on that trip, by the way... two of my friends dropped off leashes that they own, so each of the wee ones will be under control at the Fair. Phew! AND, even better news, my husband talked to his principal who is letting him skip out on the pre-school starting meetings, so he's going to join us on the trip. This may save my sanity.

Now, a few house rules while I'm gone.

No swinging from the chandeliers. And please don't spill red wine on the carpet unless you brought your own club soda to clean it up. Also, if someone wouldn't mind checking in on the cats and making sure they have food and water, that would be great.

I somehow found things to talk about while I'm gone, so you'll be treated (oh, I crack myself up!) to a new post each day that I'm gone from me. Thus I won't be here in person, but I'm here in spirit. Don't be offended when you see no responding comments from me. I'll have no computer access while I'm losing my shirt on the casino floor.

I spent (literally) an hour figuring out how to change my post settings so that you all can still leave comments while I'm gone. Techno-savvy, I'm not. Sometimes. But with that responsibility (can you tell I'm practicing for when the wee ones are in high school?), you must behave in a responsible manner, as well. I'm almost afraid of what comments I might come back to! (kidding, kidding)

And since I'm away essentially Sunday to Sunday, I won't be reading any blogs for 8 days. I can only imagine all that I'll have to catch up on once I get back, so understand that you won't see any comments from me for awhile. In fact, when I get back, it will probably take me an entire week to catch up on my blog reading. But I'll somehow suffer through and make that sacrifice.

Have fun while I'm gone, but try not to trash the place! I'll be sure to have a drink for you while I'm in Vegas. And I'll eat a cheese curd for you while at the State Fair in Minnesota. And if you don't hear from me after that, you'll know that traveling with two small children is just not a good idea!

I'm Certifiably Insane

Don't forget: tomorrow's the last day to enter to win the PIF contest - check out Monday's post!

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For my birthday last year, my sweet and generous husband arranged for a trip to NYC. We were to see Wintuck, a Cirque du Soleil show, and had front row seats. We'd also spend three days in NYC sans kids just hanging out the first week of January.

The trip was actually a lot of fun, as it had been years since I spent much time in NYC. Two of my best friends from high school had also managed to find their way to NYC, so I saw a Broadway show with one of them and her husband one night and had dinner with them and the other friend another night.

While we were reminiscing about high school and growing up in Minneapolis, etc., we hearkened back upon our days at the Fair. For the uninformed, this is the Minnesota State Fair, held the two weeks before and including Labor Day every year. Home of Princess Kay of the Milky Way carved in butter, the inventor of random foods on a stick, great livestock shows (no, that isn't an oxymoron), and from good sources, the best state fair in the country.

We decided to meet up there this August, and all was good.

The wine wore off, and I didn't think much of it. It would be fun to go, but other things kept creeping up on me and I didn't have time to worry about it. Until I got an email from one of my friends asking if we were really going because she was going to book her plane tickets.

Apparently the wine didn't wear off as much as I'd thought, and I committed to going, as did the other friend (although we still don't have confirmation from her).

After I committed, I realized what this meant. I was going to take the wee ones to a fair with hundreds of thousands of people. And I was going to drive BY MYSELF from Chicago to Minnesota with the wee ones -- both of whom get carsick in long car rides, while I just hate being in the car for more than an hour or two. Oh yeah, and I was going to drive back by myself -- or shoot myself before we got to that point, I haven't yet decided.

While the wee ones are generally well-behaved, seven loooong hours in the car do not a happy group make. And going to the Fair? A three year old and a four year old traveling with me and three adults who have no children and don't spend time around children. What was I thinking? They try to wander off when it's me with my parents who are with them all the time and know their tricks.

I seriously thought about backing out, but I can't do that to my friends, and I do truly love the Fair. I've been talking about going back since the last time I was there six or seven years ago. And two friends of mine still living in Minnesota have had second babies so far this year, and I would love to see them, too.

Would I be an evil mom if I bought leashes for the wee ones? I've seen the ones that look like animal backpacks with the tails for the leash part. Those wouldn't be too bad for a one time use like the Fair, would they? (And if I don't get collectively booed for being a rotten mom for even thinking about leashing my children, does anyone know where I can get some cheap?)

We've been practicing what to do if Mister Man gets lost. He knows to find a mom with kids and to tell her, "My name is Mister Man, and I'm lost. My mom's name is Michelle X, and her phone number is XXX-XXX-XXXX. Can you please call her so she can find me?" He's finally learned our phone number, and I always have my cell in my pocket. I'm hoping that if we repeat this drill often enough that he'll be able to execute it without too many issues. As for Little Miss... if she disappears, I think I'm sunk. Like really sunk, and that has me petrified. That's part of where the leashes come in.

I do think they'd love the Fair -- or at least as much of it as we can manage before they crash. I'm still debating whether to bring a stroller or not. The Tom Thumb donuts I know they'd be all over. The quarter for a cup of milk will be cool for Little Miss (although I'm sure it's no longer a quarter!). The yellow slides with the sacks should be fun for both of them. The tons and tons of animals (fortunately my friend's husband's favorite part, too) should keep them enthralled.

I'm still working on the hotel though. I want to stay near one of the Dales (all the malls are something-Dale -- Ridgedale (closest to where I used to live), Rosedale, Southdale, etc) which would allow me to ride the bus to the Fair versus having to drive to St. Paul and try to park and get the kids into the Fair. I need a hotel that is a true suite, as I can't sit in the hallway during naptime, and I can't be perfectly still in the dark for bedtime at 7pm either. That's proving to be somewhat of a challenge, but I still have two weeks, right?

All I have to say is that Sweet Martha's Cookie Jar had better be there, because I'm buying a bucket first thing in the morning on Thursday!