Wordless Wednesday

Why no, the wee ones aren't spoiled at all. Why do you ask?

Current Giveaways:
Thomas and Friends Adventure on Misty Island Mega Blocks set here
Lawry's Complete Meal Ideas Gift Pack with casserole here
The Dolphin: Story of a Dreamer DVD with 2 winners here
Professional cookware, courtesy Jewel here
Baby Einstein Discovery Kit here

You're Killing Me, Kid!

I have a Progresso giveaway going on here.

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Yesterday, I had my fun quarterly girls' night out with some friends from when I volunteered at an animal shelter before I had children. As a side note, 312 Chicago is on my good list. Yum!

Needless to say, I had to catch the train to get downtown before I would normally be home on Fridays. Fortunately my husband was able to help out. The plan was for me to drop Little Miss off at his school in time for him to pick up Mister Man at his school in time for them all to get to Mister Man's vision therapy appointment. After vision therapy, Mister Man had the brand new Magic Treehouse book waiting for him at the library, so they were to stop there on the way home.

My husband's usual Friday? He worked at school on lesson plans and grading and such. Then he came home and hung out alone until I got home, at which point he'd help me put the wee ones to bed.

I packed a little bag for my husband, and as we were driving to my husband's school, I reviewed it with Little Miss.

Me: Alright, Peanut. Your dinner is in here, so make sure you eat that before vision therapy because there's no more food when you get home. You have your non-dairy pizza, and Mister Man has chicken and biscuits. I packed you some tangelos and carrots and a granola bar, too, if you're really hungry.
Little Miss: Can I have the tangelo now?
Me: No, you have to share it with Mister Man. Now, I also have your registration form and the check for school next year. Daddy has to take it into the office and turn it in, or you won't be able to go there next year. It's due today. I also put Mister Man's library card in here so that he can check out the book that's on hold for him. Make sure Daddy remembers to stop at the library to get that book and so you can get your fifth star upstairs.
Little Miss: I will. Mommy? She paused with an oh-so-innocent question.
Me: Yes, Peanut?
Little Miss: Is this why he chose to be a daddy instead of a mommy?
Me: Why Daddy chose to be a daddy? I'm puzzled but intrigued here.
Little Miss: Yeah. He's doesn't know how to do this stuff. That's why he chose to be a daddy instead so he doesn't have to learn how to do all the mommy stuff.

Oh. Ummm. Sure, yes. That's why he chose to be a daddy. Actually I couldn't respond. I was laughing so hard I had tears running down my face and almost had to pull over.

It's Not Just Me

Yesterday, I was reading one of my favorite bloggers who was showing the destruction her children had made in her house while she was busy. I made a joking comment about not being the only house where socks are left in random places.

I was referring to the fact that the wee ones tend to take off their socks when playing in the basement and leaving them near the foot of the slide. And whenever they go to nap, they take off their socks and put them either somewhere to the side of their beds or under their beds.

Then I walked over to the kitchen this morning. And I saw something that made me realize I need to be very careful how I'm commenting, as karma seems out to get me lately.



This one? Totally my husband. Little Miss had taken off her socks and given them to my husband who apparently decided that the kitchen counter was an appropriate place for dirty socks.

I've since Clorox-wiped every eating surface in my house. I'm in real trouble, aren't I?

Whose Child Is He?

I helped Mister Man get ready for bed last night. After we brushed his teeth, he ran into my bedroom to say goodnight to Daddy. It was at that point that I realized there was no denying whose child he was.

He Lied To Me!

I know my husband is older than me, and sometimes it's amazing to me how different our childhoods were and the different things we remember.

It really hit home yesterday when I got the mail.

Seriously? An AARP card? And not even a "hey, we'd love to have you join us" but an actual card sent with it?

Ok, so I'm really getting some mileage out of this one. The second my husband got home and discovered it, the solicitation went straight into the shredder. Poor guy. He honestly does have well more than a decade left before he actually qualifies, but what a downer!

Blame Daddy!

So my new car has XM radio for a 90 day free trial. It's a great way to sucker everyone into learning how they can't live without it and then paying the $12.95 per month to be able to listen to all sorts of things that aren't available on your radio but may be available elsewhere with a little effort.


I get it. We no longer have an '80s station in Chicago, something I truly lament. And I can listen to whatever baseball game I choose. And they have the Big Ten network, which I'll definitely be listening to as football season arrives (NU's first game is August 30!). But really, NU football is on WGN, and I can listen to my iPod for the 80s if I want to (another new cool feature about my new cool car).


But the kids stuff is really the winner. We're a big singing family. We sing all the time, and unfortunately, it's moved from me singing to the infants (I sang the ABCs often enough that I can now sing it forwards OR backwards without thinking about it) to them singing all the time. If anyone knows how to get "Night and Day" (a Thomas song) out of my head, please let me know.


For Mister Man's second birthday, I created a music CD as the party favor -- all the songs that are kid appropriate that I can stand listening to. It ranges from the Hawaiian version of "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" (otherwise known as "Mommy's favorite song") to "Yes, We Have No Bananas" to "The Teddybear Picnic" to "My Hair Had a Party Last Night." But I've listened to it 5,235,624,632 times.


XM Radio has Disney kids (channel 115), which admittedly is aimed at kids a bit older than the wee ones. It also has XM Kids (channel 116), which has some really fun songs. We've been listening to that a lot, and it's added a bit of variety to the musical montage in my head. I also recently discovered the Old Time Radio station (channel 164).


This station plays radio programs from wayyyy back in the day. Most are from the 1940's and are mysteries or westerns and lots of fun to listen to. They tend to be fairly kid appropriate, and they enjoy listening to them.


Then we had yesterday. We were listening to Baby Snooks. Apparently Baby Snooks is not a full half hour program, as they needed to fill in the last few minutes with a song. They chose "Never Trust a Woman" by Phil Harris. Given that the wee ones were singing "Night and Day" again, I thought nothing of it.


When the song ended, Mister Man announced that it was his new favorite song. Tied with "Night and Day." Oops. (You have to listen via the link to understand why this is such an oops.) Then he started singing "You can never trust a woman" a few times. And tossed in "You can never trust a monkey" to top it off.

I heaved a small sigh of relief at that. It could have been worse. The lyrics are actually "Never trust a woman; she'll just make a monkey out of you." While I tried to convince Mister Man that other songs were his favorite, he was not to be deterred. Thinking that maybe changing the topic would help him forget his new love, I steered him onto other topics.


However, in the midst of dinner, he announced to Daddy that his new favorite song was "You Can Never Trust a Woman" which garnered raised eyebrows from Daddy. And he proceeded to sing the two lines that he "remembered." Yeah, more raised eyebrows.


Daddy's concern is that he'll do this in public and people will think that his daddy is really trying to mess him up by teaching him such things. And the lightbulb went on. That's exactly what happened. Daddy taught him that horrible song. Yep, it was him. Mommy had nothing to do with it. Phew!

There Are No Secrets Here

Yesterday, my husband and I took the wee ones to the club after naptime to go swimming for awhile. The wee ones voted to take my car, which meant I drove. As we approached the third turn of the trip (and took it), the following conversation ensued:

Little Miss: Don't miss the turn.
Me: Do you think I don't know where I'm going?
Little Miss: No.
Me: Do you guys think I'd miss a turn when driving?
Little Miss: No.
Mister Man: No.
Me: Do you think Daddy would miss the turn?
Mister Man: He missed the turn the last time he went.
Me: Oh. He did, did he?
Mister Man: Yep, he didn't turn where he was supposed to. Then he drove into rocks. Then he got back on the road and went back and turned where he was supposed to and went back on his way.
Me: Really, Daddy was driving into rocks?
Mister Man: Uh-huh.
Daddy: Excuse me. I feel the need to defend myself here (but he was laughing at the time)
Me: Alright, so what's the real story? And Mister Man, if you disagree with that Daddy's saying, feel free to let me know.
Daddy: I don't know how, but I completely forgot to turn. After I drove past the street, Little Miss told me that I'd missed the turn. I still don't know how that happened. So I went to the next street and was going to work my way back to the road, but the road I turned on looked like it was someone's driveway (side note: apparently gravel, thus the comment about driving into rocks). It actually turns out that it's a side street that would have gotten me back to the road I wanted to be on, but I didn't know that so I turned around.
Me: But seriously, you missed the turn?
Daddy: Uhhh, yeah.
Me: So Little Miss knows her directions better than you do?
Daddy: I know my directions, but I just sort of forgot. It's no fair that they can tell you everything that happens when you're not around no.

Oh yeah. No fair. No fair at all. I get all sorts of stories about what happens when the wee ones are at Grandma and Grandpa's house, what they do with Daddy, etc. No one's safe! Although, I suppose that means I'm not safe either. Fortunately, I never make mistakes around the wee ones (ha!).

The good news is that if a babysitter ever needed to take them to swimming lessons, I wouldn't have to leave written directions behind. I'd just use my child-sized mobile GPS units!