Sunday, July 25, 2010

I'm Not An Alcoholic

I have a trio of fun giveaways going on right now:

Family calendar giveaway from BusyBodyBook right here.

JumpStart Get Moving Family Fitness game for the Wii right here.

Spinbrush MyWay! (for girls) battery operated toothbrush right here.


I may have just drunk a good portion of a bottle of wine by myself, but I am not an alcoholic. Let me explain how I got to this situation in the first place.

1) I am on day three of being a single parent, and I forget how hard it is when you don't have any support at home. Sure, it's nice that when I put things a certain way they stay that way, but when I need a break, I no longer have one. No, my husband didn't leave me - he's in Vegas with a friend for five days. Yes, I'm that nice a wife.

2) I agreed to watch a friend's two children for five hours a day three Sundays in a row. While her kids are fine and mine like them, having four kids in the house while trying to avoid crying and other drama can be somewhat traumatic. Today was our third week of the three...

3) ... so I decided to take all four children by myself (see #1) to the Kohl's Children's Museum today. On their 25th anniversary celebration. A free day. To say it was crowded was a bit of an understatement. I will admit that the day went far better than I thought it would as I started out, but my grasp on sanity has obviously left me - proof being the idea in the first place.

4) I have certain rules in my car - like no throwing of any objects by anyone - that I tend to be fairly strict about. I pulled my car to the side of the road to reiterate that one on the way home after four overtired children couldn't quite manage to listen to reason while the car was moving. Once I mentioned that things like throwing items in my car (and punching each other) were the kinds of behaviors that I would need to tell my friend when she asked how her children behaved and explained to my wee one that they would be cleaning out the car entirely and all books were being removed from it once we got home, all was fine.

5) Once I got home, I was proactive and did a load of laundry. After glancing inside, I saw that Little Miss's pj bottoms from the night before were in there, so I decided to do darks. (Quick backstory - with our overnight p0tty training issues and my husband out of town, I decided to put Little Miss in Pull-Ups outside her pjs. She'd still have to stay dry, but hopefully the sheets wouldn't need to be washed twice a night. Friday night she was dry all night. Last night, not so much.) What with it being summer and my husband being out of town, we had slightly fewer darks than normal, so I took a look through my closet to see if I could toss anything extra in. Bad idea mixing Mommy's nice clothes with the wee ones' wear.

6) Once the wee ones were in bed, the washer finished at exactly the right time. As I started pulling clothes out, I noticed that there were little white things in my load of darks. Ugh, I thought, Little Miss put one of her dirty Kleenexes in her pocket and forgot to take it off. (She'd had a little runny nose for a couple days.) As I continued to pull items from the washer, I realized that no... this was in fact a Pull-Up explosion. Although I'd asked her this morning when I saw her in different bottoms what she'd done with the bottoms and Pull-Up (and ensured that she put the bottoms in the washer instead of her dirty hamper), she had "accidentally" put the Pull-Up in the washer, and I hadn't seen it when I'd peeked inside.

7) I took the entire load downstairs and outside and proceeded to spend the next thirty-five minutes shaking out each individual piece of clothing to get as much of the nasty Pull-Up goop off the clothes as possible. Interestingly, stretchy fake type materials, silky things, and velveteen don't hold onto the goobers nearly as well as regular cotton items.

8) After that thirty-five minute period, I looked like a snowman with bad dandruff. Although I had remembered to close my mouth and nose and turn my head while shaking, I was covered in the Pull-Up goobers. On the plus side, having gone through an hour long wash cycle, at least they weren't quite so urine-soaked as they had been previously. And yes, I've since taken a shower.

9) I then spent the next twenty minutes cleaning the Pull-Up goop from the washing machine itself. You'd think a Pull-Up explosion would essentially disintegrate, but no, it adheres to any and all surfaces of the washing machine, in addition to the clothing. It was not easy to get the stuck on goop off the metal in the washing machine. Every time I thought I had it all, I found more. In the end, I practically needed to crawl inside my slightly urine-smelling washing machine (whee!) to get it all removed.

10) After putting the shaken clothes back into the washing machine for a double rinse cycle (in hot water with vinegar), I still found some of the little white goobers attached to the clothes - not nearly as many, but some. Oddly enough, I almost didn't care after having drunk my little bit of wine.

On the plus side, the wee ones were so exhausted from the activities of the day that they fell straight asleep once they tumbled into bed.


Kim Moldofsky July 25, 2010 at 9:43 PM  

Eww, the imagery! Sounds a glass of wine was well-deserved!

Jen L. July 25, 2010 at 9:45 PM  

GIRL. I think I'll join you for some wine! We had a "barftastic" evening as we call it around here. My little boy woke up throwing up a little before 1, so did midnight laundry. Then I cleaned ick out of my washer,as well.

Sounds like you're holding together very well for 5 days of single parenting! I'm quite impressed by the museum outing! Hang in there...only a few more days til BLOGHER!!!!!

Pat July 25, 2010 at 9:56 PM  

You definitely deserved the wine. Eww, what an unpleasant and frustrating chore. I've had to shake kleenex pieces out of clothing due to not checking pockets, but never a disposable diaper. I used cloth diapers from 1976-1984 because disposables were too expensive for us and didn't work so well. You deserve a break in LV with friends now.

Dawn Parsons Smith July 25, 2010 at 10:22 PM  

You are a saint! Drink up, sister! You need a break:)

WeaselMomma July 26, 2010 at 6:02 AM  

Sounds like you need to finish off that bottle and start a 2nd one.

Tara R. July 26, 2010 at 7:25 AM  

I shudder at that thought of having kids still in diapers or Pull-ups.

Melisa Wells July 26, 2010 at 5:17 PM  

I'm with Tara. Yikes.

Can't wait to hear how long your first excursion alone is, after hubby gets back! :)

Michelle July 26, 2010 at 9:15 PM  

Kim - Yeah, sorry about that... but the sad thing? It doesn't even come close to doing it justice.

Jen - Ohhh I'm so sorry about that. I don't *do* puke. And fortunately, neither of the wee ones is a puker. (knocking on wood here!)

Pat - Yeah, a Kleenex is a pain, but I can deal with that. This was just wrong. Ohhhh so wrong.

Dawn - A saint? HA! I've got someone fooled :)

WeaselMomma - Tempting, isn't it? Fortunately, today was much better - and not only because I spent the majority of it with Melisa.

Tara - I'm jealous. I'm very jealous.

Melisa - Showoff. That first excursion alone? I'm pretty sure it has "massage" written all over it.

As Cape Cod Turns July 27, 2010 at 5:42 AM  

Sounds like you deserved an extra large bottle of wine. I will be happy to pick off any Pull Up goo if I see any on you while in NYC.
That's what friends are for :)

Unknown July 27, 2010 at 7:18 AM  

Wine makes everything better ;)

Karen July 27, 2010 at 8:53 PM  

I hope you're having chocolate with that. You definitely deserve it.

Hyacynth July 30, 2010 at 9:57 PM  

Next time you have a day like this and hubby is gone, call me. I'll bring another bottle of wine, and we can drink together and not feel bad because we're in each other's company.

Anonymous July 31, 2010 at 9:10 PM  

Just a few more days and its your turn to get out of town. Hang in there! Lots of drinks & fun awaits!

Michelle July 31, 2010 at 11:40 PM  

Sue - Yeah, it wasn't extra large unfortunately ;) And if I still have any Pull Up goo on me, I'll just go hide in a corner.

Megryansmom - Not everything, but fortunately it worked here ;)

Karen - Sadly, I didn't even think to grab chocolate. And I refuse to admit that there may be a next time.

Hyacynth - I may have to do that. Did I mention that when he got home on Wednesday he proceeded to sleep until 2:30pm and doesn't get why that's a problem?

Patty - Oh I'm counting the hours at this point. I'm so ready :)

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