tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post1463257690648021605..comments2023-10-05T04:21:52.525-05:00Comments on Honest And Truly!: What Happens When He Turns 13?Michellehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07803503583347758969noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-11294241785207890762010-10-22T21:13:22.566-05:002010-10-22T21:13:22.566-05:00Eileen - I absolutely agree with you on the shame....Eileen - I absolutely agree with you on the shame. And yes, while I do worry about the physical components, the mental aspects are just as troubling. I will be getting in touch with you - thank you!Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07803503583347758969noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-79367228102906766612010-10-18T19:17:44.040-05:002010-10-18T19:17:44.040-05:00Michelle, I came looking for this post because I k...Michelle, I came looking for this post because I knew you were working on something thst was troubling you. I'm sorry this is what it turns out to be about. You're right, it is a tough one. When I was little, if I felt I did something bad would sleep on the floor instead of in my bed to punish myself. I have no idea how I thought of this, but it sounds similar to your son untying his Eileenhttp://Calandroclan.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-13192192957106371692010-10-17T21:47:34.427-05:002010-10-17T21:47:34.427-05:00Unknown Mami - I do, too! The knowledge of what c...Unknown Mami - I do, too! The knowledge of what could happen down the road spurs me to act today - now the key is figuring out what to do next!<br /><br />Tracey - Nope, definitely no guarantees. This one wasn't about the grades but about finding a way to punish himself. I love that you've found out how to help Justin though.<br /><br />Kim - I hope so, too. She did observe him at theMichellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07803503583347758969noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-85519341822512620642010-10-17T20:42:45.694-05:002010-10-17T20:42:45.694-05:00I totally get why you are worrying about age 13 (o...I totally get why you are worrying about age 13 (or just "down the road"), but really, focus on the NOW. It seems like you're doing the right things and consulting the right people, and over time this might get nipped in the bud. Keep the faith!Melisa Wellshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14252498482861679154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-9800354512666671952010-10-17T17:54:59.813-05:002010-10-17T17:54:59.813-05:00Are you familiar with the Social Thinking curricul...Are you familiar with the Social Thinking curriculum by Michelle Garcia Winner? She uses the words "expected" and "unexpected" to explain a lot of issues. Maybe this problem is one that could be helped with this curriculum. For example, you could ask what is expected behavior when one has broken something. Getting problems wrong that he knows very well is unexpected behavior. Mrs4444https://www.blogger.com/profile/06426176094895489541noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-30523072455031991402010-10-17T13:00:37.596-05:002010-10-17T13:00:37.596-05:00I'm so sorry Michelle. After reading your pos...I'm so sorry Michelle. After reading your posts for some time, I know that Mister Man is a very thoughtful, sensitive, caring boy. He feels every mistake or challenge deeply within his heart. I think the right counselor will be able to help him. Having you and your husband also will help him immensely. I'm sending hugs to you. I wish I could me more help.septembermomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01570525910483384484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-60521914476814923912010-10-16T13:24:44.456-05:002010-10-16T13:24:44.456-05:00I am so sorry to hear that, Michelle. I hope he g...I am so sorry to hear that, Michelle. I hope he gets some counseling. I haven't experienced that with my kids. What terrible pain for him.Pathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04587300140099806425noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-24527553922398973152010-10-15T21:42:34.546-05:002010-10-15T21:42:34.546-05:00I agree with Mami. It took me a long time to reali...I agree with Mami. It took me a long time to realize worrying about future 'what ifs' will make YOU nuts. Work on what you can now and not fret about something that hasn't happened<br /><br />I've not had to deal with anything like this either, this self punishment. Hopefully the school's social worker can help and give you some more insight.Tara R.https://www.blogger.com/profile/02993625193184914299noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-23703027199410454962010-10-15T21:39:12.137-05:002010-10-15T21:39:12.137-05:00Sorry to be blunt, but I'd get him into counse...Sorry to be blunt, but I'd get him into counseling immediately. The self-punishing tendency is so far beyond a Social Worker's capability to assist in this case. There is also the possibility that he may start to hide the self-punishing acts and you think the problem is solved. My daughter self-injured for years and we had no clue till she had a breakdown and required hospitalization. ThePop and Icehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09293232401852452071noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-22742690659089287742010-10-15T21:25:44.465-05:002010-10-15T21:25:44.465-05:00I've dealt with many unpleasant things as a pa...I've dealt with many unpleasant things as a parent, but never anything like this. Hopefully, the school's social worker can make some suggestions after her observation.Kim @ Not Your Typical Southern Bellehttp://notyourtypicalsouthernbelle.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-74337059546500448982010-10-15T18:11:30.811-05:002010-10-15T18:11:30.811-05:00I know exactly where your mind is going for the fu...I know exactly where your mind is going for the future. There aren't any guarantees with these kids of ours, but I can say that at least our kids have parents who are trying to think ahead and prevent the problems we fear.<br /><br />One thing that has helped Justin has been the release from grading. It's quite freeing to not care about the percentage on a test. If he "punishes tracey.becker1@gmail.comhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09606831315390042198noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5494655959430218526.post-81102499212195562142010-10-15T16:41:45.613-05:002010-10-15T16:41:45.613-05:00This is heartbreaking and I hope that you find a w...This is heartbreaking and I hope that you find a way to help him learn other ways to cope.<br /><br />Please, please, don't worry about the future right now. Focus on what he is going through right now and work on it now. You will drive yourself crazy with worry trying to figure out how to solve problems that may or may not exist in the future. <br /><br />You are a great and attentive mom Claudya Martinezhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17034216831504207496noreply@blogger.com